Cheers Season 11, Episode 5: Do Not Forsake Me O' My Postman

1

The Little Match Girl

Rebecca's smoking gets her into big trouble when she accidentally starts a fire in the bar, and blames it on faulty wiring.

22 min

2

The Beer is Always Greener

Carla is forced to clean up her act and behave nicely when she's forced to find another job while Cheers is being rebuilt. Woody's faith in Kelly is shaken when he learns they have religious differences.

22 min

3

The King of Beers

A slot machine is accidentally sent to the bar. Everyone is hooked on playing it, which for them is not a bad thing as the machine is paying out to everyone, that is except to Rebecca. She sees her losing streak on the machine as a metaphor of her life. Feeling sorry for her, Sam has the machine rigged to pay out to Rebecca to make her feel better. That act doesn't quite come out as planned. Fortunes seem to be on the upswing for Norm. A stint on a beer tasting survey panel parlays itself into a paid position at the brewery as a quality taste tester. Norm is in seventh heaven and doesn't even feel the need to get paid for such work.

22 min

4

The Magnificent Six

Sam catches Rebecca smoking in the office, a no-no considering that's how the bar burnt down. Sam thinks Rebecca needs professional help and finds the harshest stop smoking program for her. The stop smoking doctor, Dr. Kluger, and Rebecca, have a war of wills. Dr. Kluger may have met his match. Meanwhile, Sam hires Henrí on a temporary basis as a bartender while Woody is on his honeymoon. On his first shift, ladies-man Henrí bets Sam that he can get more women's telephone numbers than Sam by midnight. Although initially reluctant to partake in the bet despite pressure from the gang, Sam eventually does take the bet based on the patriotic battle between the US and France. Both Sam and Henrí pull out all the stops and resort to whatever tactic will work to get numbers. However, with the score tied with a couple of minutes left, Sam lets one go due to her vulnerable state, which may cost Sam the bet. However it may be more important ultimately to win the battle.

22 min

5

Do Not Forsake Me O' My Postman

Maggie returns to Cheers and Cliffie, this time claiming she's carrying his baby. Rebecca hires a hack songwriter to create a jingle for the bar.

22 min

6

Teaching with the Enemy (1)

Rebecca spots Lilith with another man, and doesn't know whether to tell Frasier. Later, Lilith confesses to Frasier that she cheated on him - once. Frasier is devastated, and after he and Lilith talk about it, Frasier asks Lilith to tell her lover the affair is over. Lilith goes to see him - and then comes back saying she wants to leave Frasier. Meanwhile Sam hires a bouncer named Tiny, but can't bring himself to fire Tiny when nobody wants to go near him.

22 min

7

The Girl in the Plastic Bubble (2)

Lilith informs Frasier that she wants to spend a year away from him, sealed in a biosphere with her lover. Frasier reacts to this like any trained psychiatrist - he steps onto the ledge of Melville's and threatens to jump if Lilith leaves him. Lilith and Sam manage to talk him down, but Lilith insists their marriage is over. Once Lilith has gone, Frasier's friends rally round in support of him.

22 min

8

Ill-Gotten Gaines

Kelly's father is convinced that Woody has blackmail on his mind when Woody sees Mr. Gaines cheating on his wife. Rebecca plans to hold a Thanksgiving dinner at the bar.

22 min

9

Feelings... Whoa, Whoa, Whoa

Cliff is convinced that his new neighbour is Adolf Hitler. If not for Ma standing up for him, Cliff would be evicted from the building for harassment. But Cliff's still not convinced as to his neighbour's true identity. Meanwhile, Carla and John Allen Hill continue their love-hate relationship. However it has gone to a new level, to a love-hate-heart attack stage. Hill had a heart attack while they were making love. Seemingly indifferent to the heart attack since Hill is just a romp in the hay, Carla eventually breaks down in tears since "her boyfriend" had a heart attack. She suspects that the reason he did have a heart attack is she spurted out the words "I love you" to Hill.

22 min

10

Daddy's Little Middle-Aged Girl

Woody and Kelly argue once again about the difference in their monetary status. Kelly wants to live in a house purchased by her father. Woody, not wanting any Gaines money, wants them to live in his old apartment as that's all he can afford. They compromise, which shows them that one side might be more correct in their outlook than the other. Meanwhile, Rebecca's father, Navy Captain Franklin E. Howe, comes to Boston for a visit. A tough as nails man and father, he demands that Rebecca, who has screwed up her life in Boston, move back to San Diego into her old room at their house. Apparently, he has controlled her her entire life, including providing her with an allowance. He expects that Rebecca will put up a fight and demand to live her life in Boston as she sees fit. Captain Howe has an ulterior motive for his visit to Boston of which Rebecca is unaware. If she knew her father's true motive, it would change the entire nature of their disagreement.

22 min

11

Love Me, Love My Car

Woody's parents get a gift for Kelly and Woody: small pet pig named Snuffles. Pet is somewhat of a misnomer as the Boyds, from a farming background, see Snuffles as Christmas dinner. Rebecca has an immediate connection with Snuffles as an animal. She wants to buy Snuffles after she hears about its ultimate fate. When Woody won't sell, Rebecca sets Snuffles free in the country. When Rebecca hears who ends up finding Snuffles, she sees the story as a Christmas miracle, until... Meanwhile, Sam starts dating Susan Metheny, the widow of Kirby, the man who bought Sam's Corvette. Sam is only doing so as he wants his Corvette back at a reduced rate. Susan, a kindergarten teacher, is a nice, sweet, innocent, shy woman who is vulnerable at the best of times, let alone at this grieving point in her life.

22 min

12

Sunday Dinner

Frasier decides to start dating other women now that Lilith has left him and Frederick, and makes a date with his secretary, Shauna. He arrives at Shauna's house only to discover that Shauna is just using him to annoy her parents as they are not letting her see her boyfriend - who then turns up unannounced. Meanwhile, Cheers is hosting a family reunion, and Cliff and Norm are videotaping it, but then discover the camera was never switched on and have to try and recreate the video without anyone realising.

22 min

13

Norm's Big Audit

The gang decide to watch an old Red Sox game on a classic sports channel, a game in which Sam played. As this game took place during one of his drunk years, Sam is unsure if he played well or made a fool of himself in the game. Since he finds out he pitched three innings in the game, he assumes he played well. After Sam makes a big deal about watching the game, Carla reminds him that that game was indeed not one of his finest moments. Sam does whatever he can to prevent the gang from watching it. Meanwhile, Norm is being audited. The auditor is Dot Carroll, a gravelly-voiced, chain-smoking, no-nonsense, scary tough broad. Norm, the ex-accountant, knows he can fudge his way through the audit even without legitimate receipts, but when his tricks don't work, he resorts to a tactic suggested by Carla: flirt. It works, much to Norm's dismay, as Dot invites Norm back to her hotel room. But a faithful Norm now doesn't know what to do as Dot expects a sexual evening.

22 min

14

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Bar

Robin returns to Cheers, destitute. He has renounced his previous greedy ways, gave away the $6 million he had hidden in Rebecca's desk drawer and has decided to live a life of simple poverty. But admittedly, he still has feelings for Rebecca. Rebecca still has feelings for Robin, or at least for the $6 million she thinks he has. She thinks he's just testing her and that he still is rich. In the intervening time, Robin implied to the gang in an indirect way that he has hid another money belt filled with $6 million somewhere in the bar. Sam, Carla, Frasier, Norm and Cliff tear the bar apart, probe Robin and turn on each other trying to find the money belt. They then think that it was burned in the fire. But when they discover that Fire Captain Dobbins on duty the day of the fire is now retired with a sizable sum of money, they assume he stole the money.

22 min

15

Loathe and Marriage

Eighteen year old Serafina, Carla's daughter, announces that she is pregnant and wants to marry the father, a retired police officer living off disability who she loves. After discussing the issue, Carla gives Serafina her blessing and her financial support for the wedding. With her connection to Hill, Carla manages to arrange for the ceremony at Melville's - she's afraid of the bad wedding karma history at Cheers - and the reception at Cheers.

22 min

16

Is There a Doctor in the Howe? (1)

Frasier is upset when he hears that Lilith now officially want s a divorce. The staff at Cheers decide to hold a ""happy divorce"" party to cheer him up, and at the party, whilst Woody drinks too much and becomes a mean drunk, Frasier gets drunk. Afterwards Rebecca drives him home, but they end up in bed together. However, first the gang pop around to check Frasier is OK - and to watch ""The 3 Stooges"" - but just when they leave, who should show up but Lilith, who has escaped from the eco-pod...

22 min

17

The Bar Manager, The Shrink, His Wife and Her Lover (2)

After returning to Boston only to discover Frasier in bed with Rebecca, Lilith comes to Cheers to seek Sam's advice. Frasier comes after her, and Rebecca shows up as well to explain. Frasier says he can't take Lilith back after what she did - just as her lover, Dr Pascal, shows up and takes the gang as hostages unless Lilith returns to him. When Paul and John Allen Hill show up and also get taken as hostages, Lilith has to persuade Pascal to let them all go, and that she doesn't want to go back. Plus will she reconcille with Frasier?

22 min

18

The Last Picture Show

Cliff and Norm mourn the closing of the Twi-Lite Drive-In Theatre and its associated memories of simpler times. In Ma Calvin's classic convertible, Cliff, Norm, Woody and newbie drive-inner Frasier - who ends up being trunk boy - head off to watch a Godzilla (1954) triple-header on the theatre's last night. The foursome have a mixed evening at the theatre, which includes enduring Cliff and Ma's rules of car etiquette and several run-ins with an angry car neighbour. But it's Ma's convertible that takes the brunt of the evening's battles. While the foursome are at the drive-in, Gus O'Malley, the previous owner of Cheers, stops by the bar. Sam offers Gus the opportunity to relive old times not only by tending bar, but managing the bar for the evening. Gus resorts to his old tactics of yelling and intimidation to get the staff to get working.

22 min

19

Bar Wars VII: The Naked Prey

It's the annual St. Patrick's Day battle of sales between Cheers and Gary's Olde Towne Tavern. Not only does Cheers lose the battle of the hi-jinx with an unsuspecting Woody taking the brunt of the battle, Cheers also loses the sales bet. Sam has finally had as much as he can take not only with the loss once again to Gary's but performing the most humiliating task he and the guys have had to endure due to the loss. Sam threatens Gary and decides to pull out one of the biggest guns he knows: Harry the Hat. Sam asks Harry to devise and execute the ultimate plan to beat Gary. Harry refuses. Despite Carla's assertion to take matters into her own hands, Sam finally gives up permanently to Gary. When Sam goes over to Gary's to wave the final white flag, he witnesses in horror what he believes is Carla's master plan. But what he witnesses is part of a deal Gary made with Rutherford Cunningham, who Sam knows better by another name.

22 min

20

Look Before You Sleep

Sam locks his keys in the bar, meaning he can't go home. He goes to Carla's to get her keys to the bar, but Woody has them. Carla offers Sam her couch for the night, but John Allen Hill is there so Sam heads off. He visits the houses of Cliff, Norm and Frasier before finally ending up in Rebecca's house.

22 min

21

Woody Gets an Election

When City Councilman Kevin Fogarty comes to Cheers on his re-election campaign spouting a whole lot of political nothings that nonetheless woos the crowd, Frasier bets the gang that he can even get a trained monkey on the ballot and garner 10% of the vote. Without a trained monkey in sight, Frasier chooses Woody as a good surrogate. Frasier does indeed get enough signatures to get Woody on the ballot. Woody helps his own political cause when Holly Matheson, a local reporter covering the City Hall beat, mistakes Woody's farm talk as an analogy for the problems of City politics. In an early poll, Woody garners 8% popular support, enough for the gang to concede defeat to Frasier.

22 min

22

It's Lonely on the Top

Because of Woody's civic election win, Sam needs another bartender, a job he gives to Carla. To celebrate, Carla whips up a batch of one of her powerhouse drinks for the guys. The day after, everyone has a hangover. What's worse, Carla, who imbibed and got drunk herself, has a sneaking suspicion that she took someone home and slept with him, that person she believes being one of the Cheers regulars. She confides in Sam alone, and after he tells her it wasn't him, she panics and they both ponder who it could have been, with her worse nightmare having it be Cliff. When her bed-mate ultimately reveals himself, Carla and Sam have to decide how best to handle the information. Two other revelations come to light in the aftermath of the drunken spree. And Sam makes an admission of his own to Carla to make her feel better about her own further revelation.

22 min

23

Rebecca Gaines, Rebecca Loses

After Woody, Kelly and her father Lloyd arrive at Cheers talking about classical music (they'd been to a symphony), Rebecca joins in the conversation and impresses Lloyd. He invites her to a society function. Rebecca thinks it is a date and is thrilled to bits - but is in for a shock when she arrives. Meanwhile Esther Clavin has been put in a retirement home by Cliff, but whilst Cliff feels guilty, the others think he has murdered his mother.

42 min

24

The Guy Can't Help It

Don Sentry walks into the bar and into Rebecca's life. He's the repairman called in to fix the bar tap. Although Don is not Rebecca's usual type, Frasier talks her into taking a chance when she states that someone like a Don is what she should be going after. Quickly, she falls head over heals, but Sam thinks she's settling for second best. He wants Rebecca to be his fall-back if in a couple of years he has not found "Mrs. Malone". Rebecca shoots back that he is an aging Lothario way past his prime. Frasier suggests to Sam, who is hurt by Rebecca's comments, that perhaps there is some truth to Rebecca's assertion about him and that he would benefit by group therapy for sexual compulsives. Sam does go to the meeting, and after a rough start, he does admit that perhaps he is no longer happy with his life.

22 min

25

One for the Road

Whilst watching the National Cable Ace Awards, the gang sees ex-waitress Diane Chambers winning the award for best writing in a mini-series. This leads to Sam calling Diane to congratulate her, and to find out that she is married and has children. Sam tells her Diane that he too has a wife and kids, and invites Diane and her husband to visit them. Sam strongly believes Diane is lying and becomes really shocked when she walks into Cheers the following day to meet Mrs Malone. Meanwhile Rebecca's boyfriend Don proposes to her and she accidently says no, ends up heartbroken and agrees to play Sam's wife to fool Diane. Sam and Rebecca have dinner with Diane and her husband, Reed Manchester. During the dinner Don arrives and proposes to her again, and this time she manages to say yes! They leave the dinner, and Sam thinks he must look like a fool. Then Diane's husband turns out to be a fake when *his* husband Kevin appears!

98 min