CollegeHumor Shorts Season 15, Episode 1: Assassin’s New Years Resolutions

1

Assassin’s New Years Resolutions

Every year he says he’s going to get revenge, but then he gets “too busy”.

4 min

2

Your Sad Story Is Not the Same As Mine

Pain is pain, unless your friends are trying to “relate” to you. They don’t know what pain is.

4 min

3

Caught Internet Stalking

Medical records are so easy to find, it’s like they want us to look!

3 min

4

When All Your Friends Are in Relationships

Have some sympathy for the singles in your friend group.

4 min

5

This Missing Person Is Too Embarrassing

When someone goes missing, you just want to know they’re safe…and normal. Like, no weird pepperoni stuff.

5 min

6

Disney Parks: The Next Big Movie Franchise

Can’t wait to see Monorail: Endgame next year!

4 min

7

Wine Experts Taste Dogshit Wine

Sommeliers vs. some terriers.

4 min

8

Presidential Campaigns Are So Obsessed with Me!

This “Bernie” guy keeps emailing me saying he “needs my help”! What a nutjob!

3 min

9

I Feel like Everyone Hates Me, an ICE Agent

You stuff a FEW thousand kids into cages and suddenly everyone hates you???

3 min

10

I Didn’t Get Chlamydia from a Koala!

Statistically, koalas are more likely to have chlamydia than people, sooooooooo…

3 min

11

Climate Change Is the Ultimate Birth Control

The oncoming ecological apocalypse is the best way to make sure you don’t have kids!

3 min

12

College Essay Tips for School Shooting Survivors

You survived a deadly shooting on school grounds - can you also survive applying for college?

4 min

13

When the Workout Instructor’s Music Sucks

Spotify isn’t ready for a playlist THIS extreme.

5 min

14

How to Profile a House Plant Killer

To hunt a killer, you first must understand their watering routine.

3 min

15

Just One Sec

We can all have a little break, as a treat.

5 min

16

How to Fix Our Climate (so That I Can Take Long Showers)

Everyone (except me) has a big sacrifice to make.

3 min

17

If There Were Fashion Shows for Exercise Clothes

The hottest show in town for ugly shoes and too many straps.

4 min

18

iOS 14: More Rounded Boxes than Ever Before

Only Apple knows how to think outside the box…by exclusively thinking within rounded ones.

3 min

19

The CollegeHumor Cast (and Also Kyle) Catches Up

The gang gets back together to go through Lost & Found items, and also Kyle’s here (but just to watch).

4 min

20

Dropout Is a Netflix

We love that the streaming industry has become a Who’s On First? riff.

5 min

21

Mystery Porn Sounds

Can you solve this videoconference mystery?

5 min

22

Livin’ Mask Free (Music Video)

A country anthem for our doomed country.

3 min

23

How Politicians Sound When Explaining COVID Rules

Should you not dine indoors while sometimes wearing masks? Prossibly.

5 min

24

Why I’m Voting for Opposite Man

Worried about the Opposite Man? Don’t worry - feel the opposite of that!

3 min

25

What Undecided Voters Look Like to Everyone Else

Choose the pro. Be pro choice.

7 min

26

Every Terrible Thing Trump Has Done as President

Well, not including everything he’s done since this video was uploaded, I guess.

2 min

27

If I Had the Money That Bezos Had

A song about putting Jeff Bezos’ $200 billion fortune into context.

4 min

28

If Google Was a Guy: Quarantine Edition (3)

Brian Huskey and CollegeHumor alumni are back for another quarantine-inspired “Google Is a Guy”.

5 min

29

Summit of the Subreddits

Your upvote counts.

5 min

30

Tinder Profile Picture Day (Animated Edition)

A picture is worth a thousand swipes.

3 min