Late Show with David Letterman Season 14, Episode 31: Tom Arnold, Brian Regan, the latest "Survivor: Cook Islands" castaway

Andy Kindler, motocross demo with Travis Pastrana, Baby Gramps

Travis Pastrana - Andy Kidler - Baby Gramps

Zach Braff, Jeff Brendenburg, The Roots

Dave toys around with the new product from Apple Computers, the "I-Stinguisher"; a man in pajamas and a bathrobe asks Dave where he would find some coffee; writer Jeff Bredenberg promotes his book "Five Little Fixes"; The Roots perform "Here I Come."

Snoop Dogg, Charlie Hill, OK Go

In honor of the show's 13th anniversary, an intern accidentally walks onstage to ask Dave to sign his own greeting card; live from Tracy, California, Ron Patrick drives around in a silver 2000 Volkwagen Bug with a 1,450-horsepower jet engine; Dave tries to interpret Snoop Dogg's "dizzle"-speak; OK Go performed "Here It Goes Again."

Julianne Moore, radio-show hosts Opie and Anthony

Tony visits The Hamptons, where he complains about traffic; recently embarassed CNN anchor Kyra Phillips presents the Top Ten; 5,000 tennis balls are dropped onstage; Opie & Anthony promote their radio show.

Al Franken, Todd Snider

Maria Sharapova, Martha Stewart, Justin Timberlake

Ashton Kutcher, Sam Hornish, Jr., TV on the Radio

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Norm MacDonald

Anne Heche, Luke Ravenstahl, The Who

Johnny Knoxville, Rachael Ray

Johnny Dark measures Dave's inseam, much to his chagrin; while promoting "Ventriloquist Week" for the umpteenth time, Dave argues with his very own dummy; to mark the end of summer, four stagehands help explode beach balls on 53rd Street, then pour 300 gallons of sunblock off the roof.

Dr. Phil McGraw, Willie Tyler and Lester, Sekou Bunch

Day 1 of Ventriloquist Week with Willie Tyler & Lester, plus Dr. Phil and "Survivor" castoff Sekou Bunch!

Patrick Dempsey, Jay Johnson and Darwin, Kasabian

Ventriloquist Week, Day 2: Jay Johnson jokes about evolution while his primate friend Darwin sings "Send in the Clowns" in his "native" tongue; a safe is thrown out an 8th floor window onto a 1996 Buick LeSabre; Kasabian performed "Empire."

Marg Helgenberger, Ronn Lucas and Scorch, Diana Krall

Day 3 of Ventriloquist Week with Ronn Lucas & Scorch, plus Marg Helgenberger and Diana Krall!

Ted Turner, Jeff Dunham and Walter, Fergie

Day 4 of Ventriloquist Week with Jeff Dunham & Walter. Plus, Ted Turner and Fergie!

LeBron James, Todd Oliver and Irving, Ludacris

Ventriloquist Week, Day 5: Todd Oliver has a conversation with his talking dog, Irving; Dave and Lebron James shoot baskets on 53rd Street; Ludacris performed "Money Maker."

Ray Liotta, Elvis Costello & Tony Bennett, Billy Garcia

Throughout the night, several Late Show interns learn how to parallel-park; Dave looks into "A Day in the Life of Hugo Chavez"; Ray Liotta discusses meeting his biological family for the first time; Tony Bennett and Elvis Costello performed "Are You Havin' Any Fun Yet?"

Billy Bob Thornton, Lily Capehart, Sean Lennon

Ten-year-old "lizard charmer" Lily Capehart puts her amphibian pets in doll costumes; Billy Bob Thornton promotes "The School for Scoundrels"; Sean Lennon performed "Wait For Me."

Amanda Peet, Nigella Lawson, Bob Seger

Tonights guests include Amanda Peet, Nigella Lawson and Bob Seger.

Sir Richard Branson, Dane Cook, Monica

Nathan Lane, Jeff Caldwell

Pete Rose, Roy Wood Jr., Cecilia Mansilla

Andy Dick, Keith Olbermann, Brazilian Girls

Alec Baldwin, Vladae the Dog Wizard, Jerry Lee Lewis & Neil Young

Frank Caliendo, Rachael Harris, Xzibit, Phil Pfister

Amy Sedaris, Trey Anastasio

Robin Williams, J.P. Calderon, Sam Moore with Wynonna

Hartford-based meterologist Scot Haney interrupts Dave with a teaser for his five-day forecast; Tony crudely illustrates how North Korea's recent nuclear test will affect the US; Robin Williams discusses rehab and promotes "Man of the Year"; Sam Moore and Wynonna Judd perform "I Can't Stand the Rain."

Nicky Hilton, Bob Woodward, Joseph Arthur

Jon Stewart, Nick Lachey

Katie Couric, Brian Kiley, Alan Jackson

Diddy, Neil Patrick Harris

Tina Fey, Mike Golic & Mike Greenberg, The Killers

Tourist "Todd Volk" plays "Find the Pumpkin" at Hello Deli; ESPN Radio's "Mikes in the Morning" discuss Terrell Owens; The Killers perform "When You Were Young."

Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jay Thomas, John Legend

Tonights guests include Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jay Thomas and John Legend.

Tim Robbins, Gene Rurka, Russell Thompkins Jr. and The New Stylistics

Bill O'Reilly, Jeff Altman, Tilly and the Wall

Dave shows off new photos of Harry; Dave Dorsett leaves his station to goof around with a sock puppet; Dave and Bill O'Reilly have another heated discussion about current events; Tilly and the Wall (making their network television debut) performed "Bad Education."

Borat, Tiki Barber, Beck

Borat, Beck and Tiki Barber, plus a Top Ten from Jerry Springer!

Rachel Weisz, David Rakoff, Morningwood

Tonights guests include Rachel Weisz, David Rakoff and Morningwood.

Gary Sinise, Joanne Carson, Jim Norton

Dave plugs the upcoming Ball State-Michigan football game and promises to give a nickel to everyone that attends the game; Dave reads a letter from a fan pertaining to staff hostility; Joanne Carson (Johnny's second wife) discusses her collection of Truman Capote memorabilia.

Rosie O'Donnell, Lady Sovereign

Tonights guests include Rosie O'Donnell and Lady Sovereign.

Martin Short, Kinky Friedman

Martin Short performs a song-and-dance number about the internet's role in his sexless marriage; country singer/novelist/gubernatorial candidate Kinky Friedman lays down his agenda for the state of Texas.

Will Ferrell, Jack Hanna

Britney Spears drops by looking for Will Ferrell; at the end of his interview, Will ad-libs through a selection from "Phantom of the Opera"; Jack Hanna introduces Dave to Fluffy the python, the largest-known snake in captivity.

Dustin Hoffman, Jamie Oliver, The Metropolitan Opera

Outgoing Defense Secretary "Donald Rumsfeld" (Gerard) fields questions from the audience; Jamie Oliver makes sausage carbonara; the Metropolitan Opera performs a selection from the upcoming production of "Il Barbiere di Siviglia."

Kiefer Sutherland, Jenna Fischer, Rocco DeLuca

Live via satellite, Biff walks through a six-acre corn maze in Livermore, California. By the end of the show, Dave asks him if he's scared, prompting Biff to snap back, "It takes a lot more than this to scare me, man."

Daniel Craig, documentary film subject Teri Horton, Elvis Costello, Rosanne Cash

Robin Williams, Rich Little, George Jones

Day 1 of Impressionist Week with Rich Little! Also, Robin Williams and George Jones!

Jack Black & Kyle Gass, Fred Travalena, Tenacious D

Impressionist Week, Day 2: Frank Travalena closes his set by mimicing every president from Kennedy to Dubya. Also, Tenacious D (Jack Black and Kyle Gass) promote their new movie and perform "The Pick of Destiny" with the CBS Orchestra.

Ellen DeGeneres, Gordie Brown, +44

Christopher Guest, Frank Caliendo, The Game

Sen. John Edwards, Kevin Pollak, Will Arnett

Jerry Seinfeld, Dan Patrick

Tonights guests include Jerry Seinfeld and Dan Patrick. Plus, a public apology from Jerry's former co-star Michael Richards.

Hugh Jackman, Chris Elliott, Jimmie Johnson

Tonight's "Rejected FDA Products" include Hebrew National Bacon, Frozen Mayonnaise Bars (which Dave tastes), and OJ Simpson's "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter, But If I Did Believe It Was Butter, Here's How I Did It." Later, Chris Elliott and Gerard Mulligan promote their new paranormal documentary program, "Ghost Squad."

Matthew Broderick, Lupe Fiasco & Jill Scott

Tonights guests include Matthew Broderick and Lupe Fiasco and Jill Scott. Plus, Stupid Pet Tricks!

Eugene Levy, John Mayer

Dave shows footage of the staff Thanksgiving dinner, which includes a drunk Biff telling off Dave and a turkey carver severing his hand; Dave correctly guesses that his mother made pumpkin pie but flubs on the next dessert (he said pecan, it was apple); John Mayer performs "I'm Gonna Find Another You."

Helen Hunt, DJ Shadow, Q-Tip and Lateef

Kate Winslet, Tom Waits

George Clooney, The Decemberists

Richard Simmons, Kate Walsh, Ciara

A giant goat knocks over the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree; Andy Kindler visits the US Marshals Training Academy in Georgia; in his first Late Show appearance in six years, Richard Simmons introduces a food steamer he invented (which blows up in his face); Ciara performs "Promise."

Jennifer Connelly, Tom Dreesen, Shiny Toy Guns

Tonights guests include Jennifer Connelly, Tom Dreesen and Shiny Toy Guns.

Danny DeVito, 16-year-old duct tape expert William Beacom, Silversun Pickups

Teen duct tape expert William Beacom shows off his sticky creations; Silversun Pickups performed "Lazy Eye."

Matt Damon, Barbara Walters

Howard Stern, Gwen Stefani

Tonight at Hello Deli, Dave and Rupert dare a (alleged) SUNY student from Queens to eat a Taco Bell chalupa; Howard Stern walks onstage in a Father Christmas outfit, giving out free Sirius radios to the audience; Gwen Stefani performs "Wind It Up."

Kid Scientists, Regis Philbin, Robert Randolph

Tonights guests include Regis Philbin and Robert Randolph, plus Lee Marek's Kid Scientists!

Will Smith, Evanescence

An irate staffer gives Dave a holiday-themed "f*** you"; "Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton" (Gerard) fields questions from the audience; Will Smith promotes The Pursuit of Happyness and discusses attending the Tom Cruise-Katie Holmes wedding.

Clint Eastwood, Matthew Fox

Tonight's guests include Clint Eastwood and Matthew Fox are the scheduled guests.

Frank Caliendo as John Madden, Ben Stiller, Rodrigo & Gabriela

Tonight's guests include Ben Stiller, John Madden and Rodrigo y Gabriela.

Beyonce, Marv Albert, The Dears

Tonight's guests include Beyonce Knowles, Marv Albert and The Dears.

Renée Zellweger, holiday toy demonstration, Taking Back Sunday

A Yule Log is set up in front of Dave's desk, and later Dave and Renee Zellweger pose Christmas-photo style next to the green screen; Dave acknowledges Dave Dorsett's 41 years at CBS by giving him a tie; Shannon Eis' new holiday toys includes Butterscotch, an expensive animatronic pony that allegedly responds to touch but doesn't cooperate onstage; Taking Back Sunday performed "Liar (It Takes One To Know One)."

Tom Brokaw, Cold War Kids

Tom Brokaw and Cold War Kids are the scheduled guests.

Cate Blanchett, Jay Thomas, Darlene Love

Cate Blanchett and Darlene Love are tonight's guests. Plus, Jay Thomas and the 9th Annual Christmas Tree Football Toss!

Martin Short, Donal Logue

Matt Lauer, Artie Lange, Augustana

Cedric the Entertainer, Wesley Autrey, Switchfoot

Donald Trump, Mary Lynn Rajskub

David Arquette, Jennifer Hudson

Penelope Cruz, Gary Mule Deer, Ben E. King

A woman from Chicago plays "Name That Smell" at Hello Deli; after vilifying Commonwealth Edison, Alan gets beaten up by one of their employees; Ben E. King performs "Stand By Me."

Peter O'Toole, Marc Maron

Tonight's guests are Peter O'Toole and Marc Maron, plus a Top Ten from baseball legends Cal Ripken Jr. and Tony Gwynn!

Julianne Moore, Madonna, The Hold Steady

Videotape operator Tom Catusi apologizes for making a cheap shot at Mark McGwire; Madonna discusses her controversial adoption of a Malawian baby; Dave puts on a raincoat and promotes Gordon's Fish Sticks; The Hold Steady performs "Stuck Between Ready."

Kristin Chenoweth, John Witherspoon, Josh Ritter

A Late Show Fun Fact: the actual Godzilla was only seven feet tall and was killed by Japanese soldiers within minutes; John Witherspoon describes a recent incident involving smoking a marijuana cigarette; Josh Ritter performed "Girl in the War."

Amy Sedaris, Jason Randal, America with Ryan Adams & Ben Kweller

Dave acknowledges the 7th anniversary of his quintuple-bypass with a clip from "Sanford & Son"; magician Jason Randal wows Dave with a few more of his trademark card tricks; '70s soft-rockers America (featuring Ryan Adams and Ben Kweller) performed 'Ride On.'

Paul Newman, Sebastian Bourdais, Diana Ross

Paul Newman, Sebastian Bourdais, and Diana Ross are the scheduled guests.

Tina Fey, Terri and Bindi Irwin

Tina Fey discusses the Golden Globes and explains why she hates Los Angeles; escape artist "Donnie Glenn" balks at being sealed in a milk can filled with water; Terri & Bindi Irwin (the widow and daughter of Steve Irwin) promote Australia Week 2007.

Harry Shearer, Vera Farmiga, Mat Kearney

Dave promotes the new, improved Late Show web site; "El Nino" (Gerard) drops by to take a bow; Vera Farmiga promotes "Breaking and Entering"; Mat Kearney performs "Nothing Left to Lose."

Dan Rather, Tricia Helfer, Andy Kindler

Dave comments on this winter's damaged citrus crop by opening a carton of "Tropicana Just Rind"; Tricia Helfer of "Battlestar Galactica" fame promotes her upcoming Playboy pictorial; seven pounds of marzipan are thrown into the "Will It Float" tank (it sinks).

Kevin Spacey, Alicia Keys, Nellie McKay & The Brooklyn Philharmonic

Ricky Gervais, Forest Whitaker, The Shins

Ricky Gervais, Forest Whittaker, and The Shins are the scheduled guests.

Frank Caliendo, Mandy Moore, Rosanne Cash

Bill Murray, LeBron James

David Spade, Alexandra Pelosi, Dustin Kensrue

Dr. Phil McGraw, Fall Out Boy

Randy Jackson, Harry Connick Jr., Regis

Chris Elliott, Kelly Ripa, John Mellencamp

Jack Hanna, Katherine Heigl, Patty Griffin

Rachael Ray, Frank Caliendo, The Fab Faux

Drew Barrymore, Rickie Lee Jones, Kevin Johnson with Clyde & Matilda

Peyton Manning, Dan Horn with Orson, The Cat Empire

Martha Stewart, Otto Petersen with George, Norah Jones

Sienna Miller, NAS, Jim Barber with Seville

Tracy Morgan, Gabrielle Union, Brad Cummings and Rex

The Cat Empire

Jim Carrey, Daytona 500 winner Kevin Harvick

Barbara Walters, David Neeleman, K-os

John Travolta, Eric Nerhus, a performance from the Broadway musical "Spring Awakening"

Billy Bob Thornton, Rashida Jones, Barenaked Ladies

Samuel L. Jackson, Jim Gaffigan

Jake Gyllenhaal, Brand New

Evangeline Lilly, Jeff MacGregor, bubble blowing guy Tom Noddy

Sen. John McCain, Robin Thicke

Bob Woodruff, John Mayer

Charles Grodin, Dan Naturman

Dave reminisces about his teen years and shares an antedote about a ruined fur coat; Charles Grodin promotes his one-minute commentaries on CBS Radio and shows off some of his horse photography.

Chris Rock, Sandra Oh, Amy Winehouse

Dave admits that he's never participated nor believes in Daylight Savings Time; Chris Rock promotes "I Think I Love My Wife"; Amy Winehouse performed "You Know I'm No Good."

Jeff Goldblum, Barbara McQueen

Jeff Goldblum, Barbara McQueen

Richard Gere, Explorers Club chef Gene Rurka, Aqualung

Bernie Mac, Paula Abdul, Joss Stone

Bernie Mac, Paula Abdul, Joss Stone

Adam Sandler, Don Cheadle, Danica Patrick, Todd Barry, Lucinda Williams

Fill-in host Adam Sandler (with assistance from his dog, Matzoball II) welcomes Don Cheadle, Danica Patrick, and Todd Barry as his guests. Lucinda Williams performs "Are You Alright?"

Jack Black, Lara Logan, beer launching refrigerator creator John Cornwell

Tonight's "Great Moments in Presidental Speeches" clip is doctored to include Sue Hum using a lint brush on JFK's right arm; Duke University post-grad John Cornwell demonstrates his new invention, the beer-launching refrigerator; Jack Black shares an antedote about meeting Jack Nicholson; CBS chief foriegn correspondent Lara Logan discusses reporting from war zones in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Will Ferrell, Kings of Leon, Rachel Smith

Will Ferrell, Kings of Leon, Rachel Smith

Patricia Arquette, Paul Mooney, Macy Gray

Al Franken, Isla Fisher

Rosario Dawson, Bloc Party, Piedmont bird callers

Donald Trump, Jon Heder

Sen. Barack Obama, Halle Berry, Zach Johnson

David Duchovny, Ryan Howard, Andrew Bird

Alec Baldwin, Debbie Parkhurst and her dog Toby, LCD Soundsystem

Bruce Willis, Jason Randal

Bill Cosby, Angela Kinsey

Kelly Ripa, Simon Pegg

Kelly Ripa, Simon Pegg, and Jim Short are the scheduled guests.

Craig Ferguson, Dave Della Terza, Avril Lavigne

Edie Falco, Paul Scheer, Son Volt

Garry Shandling, Paul Teutul Sr. and Jr., Tokyo Police Club

Jessica Biel, Ira Glass, Regina Spektor

Brian Williams, Steven Wright, a Top Ten list presented by Sanjaya Malakar

Top Ten list presented by Sanjaya Malakar

David Hyde Pierce, Ivanka Trump, Corinne Bailey Rae

Nicolas Cage, Barry Sonnenfeld, The Fratellis

Steve Martin, Dave Cota and A.J. the parakeet, Derek Jeter

Steve Martin dominates the show, as he interrupts Dave twice, gets a lapdance from a male stripper, plugs his new book, and performs "The Crow" with banjoists Tony Trischka and Bela Fleck. Also, David Cota and his parakeet AJ perform a few tricks for Dave.

Frank Caliendo as President George W. Bush, Andy Dick, Jarvis Cocker

Kirsten Dunst, Rob Magnotti, Dinosaur Jr.

Day 1 of "Impressionist Week 2" with Rob Magnotti. Kirsten Dunst and Dinosaur Jr. are the scheduled guests.

Tobey Maguire, John Byner, Modest Mouse

Drew Barrymore, Mike MacRae, Ben Kweller

Marcia Cross, Joe Piscopo, Tori Amos

Ray Romano, Reggie Reg, Dennis Haysbert

Day 5 of "Impressionist Week 2" with Reggie Reg. Ray Romano and Dennis Haysbert are the scheduled guests.

Regis Philbin, Darlene Love

Jane Fonda, Tom Ruprecht, Kelly Clarkson

Lindsay Lohan, Tom Dreesen, The Kooks

Dr. Phil McGraw, Jack Hanna

Dr. Phil McGraw and Jack Hanna are the scheduled guests.

Charles Grodin, Jake Johannsen

Mike Myers, America Ferrera

Don Rickles, Michael Imperioli, Wilco, a Top Ten List presented by Masi Oka

Don Rickles, Michael Imperioli, and Wilco are the scheduled guests. Plus, a special Top Ten from Masi Oka!

Ricky Gervais, Mary Lynn Rajskub, Mavis Staples, a Top Ten List presented by Bob Barker

Ricky Gervais, Mary Lynn Rajskub, and Mavis Staples are the scheduled guests. Plus, a Top Ten by Bob Barker!

Kid Scientists, Luke Wilson, Rufus Wainwright, a Top Ten List presented by Homer Simpson

Top Ten List presented by Homer Simpson

Teri Hatcher, Jonah Hill, Elvis Costello

Rudolph Giuliani, Mike West, Jesus & Mary Chain

Charles Barkley, Seth Rogen, Michael Martin Murphey

Stupid Pet Tricks, Rosie Perez, Dr. Dog

Al Gore, Jim Short

Kevin Spacey, Alexis Bledel

Matt Damon, Indianapolis 500 winner Dario Franchitti, Bright Eyes

Chevy Chase, Amanda Beard, Satellite Party

Nicole Richie, Artie Lange, Chrisette Michele

Amy Sedaris, Chuck "The Iceman" Liddell, Jordan Zevon

Ellen Barkin, Brian Regan

Denis Leary, Flight of the Conchords, Neal Seaver

Kyra Sedgwick, Sir Richard Branson, Maroon 5

Bear Grylls, Jeremy Piven, Elvis Perkins

John Cusack, Pink Martini, Turkey Gobbling Champions

Michael Moore, Bill Burr

Bruce Willis, Tony Parker, diving dogs

Amanda Peet, John Krasinski, Bryan Ferry

Claire Danes, Dan Patrick & Keith Olbermann, Ryan Adams & The Cardinals

Robin Williams, Julie Chen

Dennis Kucinich, Shia LaBeouf, Morrissey

Don Cheadle, Smashing Pumpkins, Venus Williams

Sienna Miller, Michael Cera, Interpol

Diddy, Emma Watson, Spoon

Paul Teutul Sr. and Jr., Vera Farmiga, Joe Matarese

Queen Latifah, Alan Zweibel, Smashing Pumpkins

Michelle Pfeiffer, Jonah Hill, Michel Lauziere

Adam Sandler, Mike Golic and Mike Greenberg, Mute Math

John Travolta, Paula Abdul, Teddy Thompson

Kevin James, Jose Andres, White Rabbits

Julia Stiles, Pete Jordan, Nick Griffin

Drew Carey, Nikki Blonsky, Grinderman

Paul Rudd, Tony Dungy, The National

Catherine Zeta-Jones, Bob Sarlatte, Porter Wagoner

Sharon Osbourne, Brian Kiley, Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Anne Hathaway, Jim Gaffigan, Buffalo Tom

Andy Samberg, Catherine Bell, The Bravery

Sen. Joe Biden, Seth Rogen, Gogol Bordello

Matt Damon, Jeff Altman, Angelique Kidjo

Matt Damon, Jeff Altman, and Angelique Kidjo are the scheduled guests.

Jackie Chan, Chelsea Handler, Michael Buble

Glenn Close, Judd Apatow, Chris & Rich Robinson

Jeff Goldblum, Hayden Panettiere, New Pornographers

Samuel L. Jackson, Christiane Amanpour, Tom Russell

Richard Gere, Tom Dreesen, Velvet Revolver

Tina Fey, Venus Williams, Steve Earle

Tom Arnold, Kristin Gore, Jim McDonald

Susan Sarandon, Rick Reilly, Feist

Kevin Bacon, Kat Von D, T.I. with Wyclef

Ellen DeGeneres, Jeff Garlin, Against Me!

Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, Willie Nelson & Kenny Chesney

Amy Sedaris, Will Arnett