The Arthur Haynes Show Season 10, Episode 5: Episode 5

1

Episode 1

Arthur shows how to get a double whiskey for sixpence, but isn't so lucky when he breaks into a house only to find fellow burglar Michael Caine has beaten him to it; the ensuing conversation provides a novel insight into the criminal world. There's also music from the glamorous Yana. Original ITV Transmission 8 December 1962

30 min

2

Episode 2

Arthur has a free tour of a Tudor stately home - courtesy of Nicholas Parsons - before adopting his tramp persona and getting into an altercation over his spot on a park bench. The musical guests are the King Brothers. Original ITV Transmission 15 December 1962

30 min

3

Episode 3

Kenneth Griffith plays a tramp who studies the stock market, while Wendy Richard plays the daughter who finds an aristocratic boyfriend in the elegant form of Mr. Parsons. Sadly, tea at the Haynes' home does nothing to bridge the social gap. Pearl Carr and Teddy Johnson provide the songs. and Teddy Johnson provide the songs. Original ITV Transmission 22 December 1962

30 min

4

Episode 4

Athur has a worrying time as a lighthouse keeper confronted by a Nazi who thinks the War's still on, while economics students may appreciate his attempt to persuade the bank to change his out-dated fiver. Guests are John Bluthal and vocal team the Mudlarks. Original ITV Transmission 29 December 1962

30 min

5

Episode 5

Glyn Houston takes on a familiar role as a newspaper editor, while Arthur and Leslie excel themselves when they try to take try to a shed into a train carriage. The Kaye Sisters fill the musical guest spot. Original ITV Transmission 5 January 1963

30 min

6

Episode 6

Arthur and Dermot choose to hide in the very barn that thieves use to deposit their ill-gotten gains; Arthur then plays a burglar returning to the scene of his crime to complain that he's been bitten by a dog. Soprano Susan Lane is the musical guest. Original ITV Transmission 12 January 1963

30 min

7

Episode 7

Arthur's tramp has a few things to say about democracy and the landed gentry, before telling an unfortunate architect where his latest project went wrong. The guest soloist is Susan Maughan. Original ITV Transmission 19 January 1963

30 min

8

Episode 8

The long-suffering Nicholas finds himself in hospital, his leg in plaster and suspended over the bed; but his pain is nothing compared to the agony of coping with visitors Arthur and Leslie. Arthur's guest singers are the Springfields. Original ITV Transmission 26 January

30 min

9

Episode 9

Arthur and Dermot plague a casualty department, before causing an unfortunate misunderstanding with a tailor's dummy on board a train. The legendary Alma Cogan is star guest. Original ITV Transmission 2 February 1963

30 min

10

Episode 10

Arthur and Leslie are two builders causing chaos as they try to get Nicholas's heating going, while with fellow tramp Dermot, Arthur ponders the practicalities of a trip to the Moon. Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen supply the music. Original ITV Transmission 9 February 1963

30 min

11

Episode 11

The reading room of a gentlemen's club is a hallowed haven of tradition and mutual respect. So what sort of man would be cad enough to sit in another man's chair Perhaps we should ask Nicholas! Janie Marden provides the songs. Original ITV Transmission 16 February 1963

30 min

12

Episode 12

Ex-boxer Freddie Mills and actress Rita Webb assist in this show, with Arthur getting on the wrong side of Freddie before teaming up with fellow tramp Dermot and trying to convince landlady Patricia Hayes they have special powers. The musical guest is Dickie Valentine. Original ITV Transmission 23 February 1963

30 min

13

Episode 13

The theme of this show is money: Arthur plays both the Chancellor of the Exchequer - who's miffed to hear he isn't invited to the PM's party -and a tramp who's determined to get his National Assistance money. Anne Shelton is the musical guest. Original ITV Transmission 2 March 1963

30 min

14

Episode 14

Nicholas is the unlucky train passenger whose reading is interrupted by Arthur's assorted eccentricities. And only Arthur, in tramp mode, could defend himself the way he does against a charge of disturbing the peace! Patsy Ann Noble occupies the vocal spot. Original ITV Transmission 9 March 1963

30 min

15

Episode 15

Nicholas shows a dangerous liking for the wrong team when he goes for a shave at the barber's, then experiences further indignities at the hands of Arthur in the guise of his tramp character. Shani Wallis is the guest vocalist. Original ITV Transmission 16 March 1963

30 min

16

Episode 16

The setting is a hotel; the guest is Nicholas; the garrulous busybody who enters the room is Arthur, and Nick has every reason for resenting the strange questioning he undergoes. Kathy Kirby is Arthur's star guest. Original ITV Transmission 23 March 1963

30 min

17

Episode 17

A most unusual interview between doctor and patient takes place when Nicholas visits his psychiatrist - who happens to be Arthur Haynes. Haynes' tramp also finds a new home, while husband and wife vocal team Miki and Griff fill the musical guest spot. Original ITV Transmission 30 March 1963

30 min

18

Episode 18

Arthur's indignant when the bank loses his pound note, but as a tramp he has no such worries: somewhat surprisingly, he's harbouring an ambition to become a playwright. Sheila Buxton is the musical guest. Original ITV Transmission 6 April 1963

30 min

19

Episode 19

Anyone who's been pestered in a park by an intrusive stranger will sympathise with Nicholas's character in this show; and, donning his tramp persona, Arthur tries to get to grips with the workings of a clock. The guest star is jazz legend Cleo Laine. Original ITV Transmission 13 April 1963

30 min

20

Episode 20

Joan Newell plays a dowager in an inhospitable manor house, with Nicholas as manservant and Arthur as duke; a contrasting skit sees Arthur and Dermot as tramps whose efforts to reach Ireland are thwarted by Mr. Parsons. Jill Day is guest vocalist. Original ITV Transmission 20 April 1963

30 min

21

Episode 21

Arthur goes from one extreme to the other in this show, donning the mantle of a medieval English king before playing a well-meaning tramp who comes to the aid of a stricken dental patient. Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen provide the music. Original ITV Transmission 27 April 1963

30 min