The Naked Truth Season 3, Episode 9: He Ain't Famous, He's My Brother

1

Things Change

Camilla takes the reins at the National Inquisitor and hires Nora to be the top reporter. Meanwhile, Nora's ex wants another chance at romance.

2

Her Girl Friday

Hey, jealousy! The staff suspects that Nora gets special treatment from Camilla. But a plan to quell the envy backfires when Camilla starts abusing Nora ""like any other employee.""

3

Bully for Dave

Reports by Nora that Norman Fell is dead are greatly exaggerated, and the TV-star shows up in person to tell her. Meanwhile, Dave runs into his ""big crush"" from high school.

4

Liesl Weapon

Jake meets Nora's beautiful college roommate, who's one ferocious Fraulein. But while he's out romancing the Hun, Nora is stuck doing his work.

5

Bridesface Revisited

Nora's ex-husband, Leland, is remarrying and invites her to the wedding. But upon meeting the bride, Nora swears she's seen that face before.

6

We Almost Had Paris

Nora and Jake pose as newlyweds to stake out a Paris-bound plane that's supposed to have a reclusive celebrity booked in first class.

7

Look at Me! Look at Me!

When a beautiful but temperamental celebrity adopts Nora as her ""new best friend,"" Camilla smells a story and orders Nora to ""stick with her until you find it.""

8

Going Mein Way

Amid a flurry of favor-doing, Harris ends up researching a genealogy and learns that Bradley is not related to der Bingle, but to der Fuhrer.

9

He Ain't Famous, He's My Brother

Nora finally gets her chance to write a cover story: a profile of the Baldwin brothers based on an interview with Duane, the ""loser Baldwin.""

10

The Unsinkable Nora Wilde

Nora hopes she can stay afloat while interviewing four survivors of the Titanic. Meanwhile, Jake is bothered by a ribald dream.

11

Hooked on Heroine

Nora gets some strange looks-and an unusual sense of confidence-when she's lassoed into wearing the original Wonder Woman costume for an evening.

12

Women on the Verge of a Rhytidectomy

Camilla and Nora check out a tip that a plastic surgeon to the stars has been lifting more than faces: he likes to peek at the celebs while they're out cold on the table.

13

8 1/2

Nora fudges whether Mary Kay of Mary Kay Cosmetics owns eight dogs or nine dogs. At her request, Harris lets it slide and the Inquisitor is sued. The publisher brings in an incompetent ombudsman to oversee Harris' every move and decision. (Favorite joke: Harris and the fact checker argue over whether a tomato is a fruit or a vegetable. Camilla calms them by exclaiming, ""Gentlemen, please! We had the same argument about J. Edgar Hoover when he slipped into a coma."") Nora feels guilty and agrees to do a favor for Harris in return. Harris asks her to get eight of a specific type of bird from pet stores around town. On her mission, Nora learns the importance of being precise as she encounters one instance of misinformation and incompetence after another. She ultimately fails to bring Harris the precise number of birds he requested, but learns an appreciation for the exactness of his life and work. Jake and Camilla decide to act on Jake's sexual dream about her. But first, Camilla insists h

14

The Neighbor of Bath

Dave complains about his long commute to Nora, who suggests he check out the apartment across from her which is now vacant. He takes it. Nora's jealous of the huge bath in Dave's apartment and he offers to let her use it whenever she wants. He also springs some exciting news on her -- he's engaged to Christy -- his old high school flame that he hooked up with in ""Bully For Dave."" Nora insists on throwing them a party. The next night when Dave comes home, he finds Nora in his bathtub. Christy walks in on them and assumes they're having an affair. Dave tries to convince her and Nora helps, suggesting that she doesn't find Dave at all sexually attractive. In fact, he looks like Fred Mertz. Christy's fears are put aside -- but when Dave goes to kiss her, all she can hear is Nora's comparison of him to Lucy's bald, fat, old neighbor. Dave is beside himself as the days go on. She won't even sleep with him. He insists that -- at their engagement party -- Nora come on to him, to show Christy h

15

Day of the Locos

Bradley stuns the office by selling a screenplay for a million dollars. Nora can't believe such a no-talent could actually be considered a writer. Bradley overhears and is devastated. The next day he gets notes from the studio -- and they agree with Nora. Nora offers to help Bradley. Collaborating with Bradley, however, proves more difficult than she imagined -- as they have to overcome his mannered, ineffective work habits and inane story sense. Eventually, she gets him to incorporate a very personal story of her youth to deepen the film. The studio ends up hating the new draft, however, and, in desperation, Bradley suggests throwing in a talking horse. Nora's horrified. But the studio loves it. The show ends ""a year later,"" where Bradley and Nora watch the movie play out. It's Nora's personal story done with a talking horse. And she's moved. Dave's poker ace sister comes to town and takes an immediate liking to Jake. Dave gets Jake to take his sister out. She aggressively insists Jak

16

Muddy for Nothing

Nora infuriates a powerful publicist when her car splashes mud on the woman. Camilla insist Nora apologize or the paper risks the wrath of this harpy. They try to apologize, but the publicist refuses to accept. Indignant, Nora insults her -- bringing down the woman's full anger on them. The Inquisitor is frozen out by everyone in town and -- with a deadline fast approaching -- has nothing for their cover. Desperate, everyone fans out to find something: Jake and Harris go undercover as men's' room attendants in a posh Beverly Hills hotel; Dave and Suji pose as husband and wife to meet with Pamela Lee and Tommy Lee's therapist; Nora meets the most pathetic PR man in Hollywood; and Bradley dresses up in his old Bigfoot costume. Nothing works and Nora decides to swallow her pride and grovel to the PR maven. An apology isn't enough, however. The PR woman insist that Nora work out on the over-sized woman's Stair-Master while singing ""Yankee Doodle Dandy"" -- while the woman throws mud at her.

17

Born to be Wilde

Jake enters a celebrity pool tournament to see if it's rigged or not. Nora goes with him as a ""chalk girl."" While hot-dogging it in a match with Gary Coleman, however, Jake whacks himself in the eye with a cue stick. Nora must take his place -- and her deep secret is revealed. She's a pool shark with a nasty competitive edge. After wiping the floor with Gary Coleman, she works her way to the finals to face Trisha Yearwood. Jake convinces her to throw the match to salvage their story. Nora reluctantly agrees. But when Trisha Yearwood gloats about her skill, Nora can't take it and a brawl ensues. Philosophical back at the bar, each nursing their separate bruises, Nora challenges Jake to a game of pool. Jake is just as bad as before and Nora offers to show him how to shoot better. There's a brief connection between them as she holds his hands, gliding the pool stick. Suji and Harris both want a deceased worker's office. Suji suggests they emulate a van contest she saw at a mall, where who

18

The Seer and the Sucker

Nora challenges Harris' skepticism of all things mystical and takes him to see a tarot card reader. Harris is unimpressed with the reader's seemingly keen insights into him. Nora, however, is devastated when the seer tells her she will ""never find true love. Ever."" Trying to get Nora out of her funk, the office decides to pull names out of a hat for the New Year's Eve Party at Wong's Restaurant (resurrected from the first season) with each person bringing a blind date for the other. Things work out badly for everyone -- especially Nora, who, through Bradley's error, ends up not getting a date at all. Ready to throw in the towel, Nora opens her fortune cookie, which reads, ""You will find true love."" Ecstatic, Nora leaves to phone her mother. Everyone opens their fortune cookies and finds the same fortune. Harris admits to ""rigging the cookies,"" but refuses to be dubbed a sentimentalist by the others.

19

Can't We All Just Get Along?

Tensions at the office reach the boiling point. Nora suggests bringing in a group therapist to help. Everyone gets angrier at having to give up their Saturday for the therapist and a session meant to provoke honest communication deteriorates into a nasty, name-calling, finger-pointing affair. Nora leaves, angry and disappointed in the others. When she returns to work on Monday, she finds a changed office of nice, friendly people helping each other. Jake explains that after she left, everyone was shamed into trying to make the workplace a little more hospitable. Unfortunately, nice people don't make great tabloid reporters and the paper's newest edition is terrible. Camilla is furious at Nora for wreaking havoc on a system that worked and rallies the group to be the awful people they were born to be. Nastiness is what makes them special. It's their gift. Nora has to admit Camilla's got a point.

20

Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice, Except with Different Names (1)

Jake's old rival -- Colin -- is having an illicit affair with Nora. When the office finds out, they're infuriated. He works for a tabloid TV show as a reporter -- he might steal a story from them through Nora. Nora's insulted at the suggestion. Meanwhile, Jake and Camilla's secret affair becomes very public knowledge when they become inadvertently locked outside after a late night tryst on the balcony. They are found naked the next day by a stunned collection of workers. Nora lambastes Camilla for her hypocrisy about secret affairs, but they make up and agree to all go out to dinner together. While at dinner, it comes out that Colin and Jake competed over everything. And that one of the reasons Colin went after Nora was that he heard Jake thought she was attractive. Jake denies it, but Nora won't let it go, grilling Colin about whether he's dated her because of her or because of Jake. Meanwhile, Camilla tells Jake they have to break things off. Now that they've been discovered, the thr

21

Jake Or Fake? (2)

Jake and Nora drink ""Scotch floats"" in her apartment and share their tales of broken relationships -- Jake with Camilla and Nora with Colin. Upon leaving, they have an unintentional goodnight kiss. The next day at work, things are awkward and both decide to pretend as if it never happened. Colin comes to Jake desperate. He's in love with Nora. Jake's got to help him. Jake supplies Colin with advice on the things Nora likes -- which Colin is clueless about -- and how to win her back. He surprises himself with how much he actually knows about her. Colin sets about wooing Nora back -- and succeeds. All is forgiven. Suji reprimands Jake for doing this. It's obvious he's got a thing for Nora. And if he doesn't act on it, he'll always regret it. Jake agrees and finds Nora at the restaurant she's meeting Colin at. He explains to her that he told Colin what to do and how to win her back, but Nora dismisses it as part of their stupid competitiveness. Jake leaves, disgusted. Colin arrives and ov

22

Up, Up, and Away

The show opens at night, with everyone sitting in a hot air balloon. Nora dictates into a tape recorder that they are lost and no longer with food or water. She sets about explaining how they got there. We dissolve back in time and find Jake and Nora in bed together -- having the worst sex either has ever had. After talking it over, they try again -- with no improvement. Debating about trying a third time, they're called to work at this ungodly hour by their beepers. At work, Camilla explains that Barbra Streisand is getting married today in Malibu. It's the tabloid story of the year. Unable to get there by any other means, they decide to infiltrate by hot air balloon. Suji's boyfriend, Leo (from ""Neighbor of Bath"") operates one. The balloon strays horribly off course. Not only are they not going to get their story -- it looks like they might die as well. Scared and depressed, they confront their fate -- discussing their regrets in life and their fear of what lies ahead. Nora admits th