The Cosby Show Season 1, Episode 9: How Ugly Is He?

1

Pilot / Theo's Economic Lesson

Clair is furious when Theo brings home a report card with 4 D's. He tells Cliff that he has no intention of going to college, as he feels that he is destined to be a ""regular person."" Cliff uses Monopoly money to teach him about the economic realities that many blue-collar workers must face. He assures Theo that he only wants him to try his best. Cliff is alarmed to meet Denise's latest beau, a former merchant marine who once spent time in a Turkish prison.

22 min

2

Mr. Fish (a.k.a. Goodbye, Mr. Fish)

When Rudy's pet fish, Lamont, dies, Cliff tries to bring the family together for a funeral in the bathroom. The festivities end when Rudy gets bored and leaves to watch TV.

22 min

3

Bad Dreams

Vanessa claims that she is old enough to watch a scary movie, but Cliff still forbids it. Vanessa sneaks out anyway, but ends up having nightmares as a result.

22 min

4

Is That My Boy?

Freshman Theo tries out for the football team and makes it. Cliff is overjoyed, but his pride falters when he discovers his son will never be a star. Theo, however, is just happy being on the team.

22 min

5

A Shirt Story

Theo wants to impress a girl by wearing an expensive shirt by designer Gordon Gartrelle. Since Cliff and Clair will not pay for it, Denise offers to make a copy of the shirt for him. Guest appearance by Kadeem Hardison, who years later would portray Dwayne Wayne on the Cosby Show spinoff, A Different World.

22 min

6

Breaking With Tradition

Cliff's father, Russell, pays a visit and begins questioning Cliff about the kids' college choices. He asks Denise about Hillman, his and Cliff's alma mater. Denise is dead-set against it at first, until Russell tells her that the males outnumber the females there. First appearance of Earle Hyman as Russell Huxtable, Cliff's father.

22 min

7

One More Time

While Clair cares for a friend's baby, she begins to consider having another. Cliff desperately tries to talk her out of it, claiming that babies are "false advertising." Clair's mother, Carrie, then reminds her that the older you are when you have kids, the older you'll be if they end up having to come back and live at home. First appearance of Ethel Ayler as Carrie Hanks, Clair's mother.

22 min

8

Play It Again, Vanessa

Vanessa plays clarinet in the school's orchestra. Though she tries her best and practices daily, she simply cannot play the instrument. She plays an embarrassing solo at the school concert, but her parents support her anyway. Guest Dizzy Gillespie as Mr. Hampton, Vanessa's music teacher.

22 min

9

How Ugly Is He?

Denise has a new boyfriend, David, but is reluctant to bring him home. She fears that Cliff will, like always, make fun of the boy and ruin her chances with him. Cliff and Clair are initially impressed with David until he expresses some unwanted opinions about medicine and the law at dinner. Kristoff St. John plays boyfriend David.

22 min

10

Bonjour, Sondra

Sondra, the eldest Huxtable child makes her first appearance when she visits home for Thanksgiving. She plans on going to Paris for the summer, and hopes that her parents will support the decision.

22 min

11

You're Not a Mother Night

Clair is exhausted from constantly caring for the children. Cliff decides to take her out on the town for "You're Not a Mother Night." They go to a fancy restaurant and hotel. While there, some of Clair's motherly instincts start kicking in-but they stop in time for a romantic evening.

22 min

12

Rudy's Sick

Clair could be named partner at her law firm if an interview goes well-but Rudy is sick! Cliff vows to take care of her while Clair works, and engages in some unique doctoring methods. Clair is named partner and Rudy is fine by the end.

22 min

13

Father's Day

Cliff complains about the poor quality of his annual Father's Day gifts. He challenges the children to find some better presents for a December Father's Day. They give him thoughtful-if not quite attractive-presents.

22 min

14

Independence Day

Theo gets his ear pierced to impress a girl, but Denise thinks it might be infected. She is correct, and Theo must go to Cliff. Cliff hopes that Grandpa Huxtable will punish Theo, but the old man instead relates the story of how Cliff tried to slick back his hair to impress Clair, but ended up burning it off! Russell brags, and Anna reminds him of the time that he had a tattoo of her name placed on his chest, but ended up with a huge scar on his chest when he tried to remove it after Anna found out he was actually trying to impress another girl! First appearance of Clarice Taylor as Anna Huxtable, Cliff's mother.

22 min

15

Physician of the Year

Cliff is set to receive an important award, but a woman goes into labor right before the ceremony. Theo delivers his speech for him. Aleta Mitchell as Mrs. Randall, Elisa de la Roche as Nurse, Sheldon Leonard as Dr. Wexler

22 min

16

Jitterbug Break

Cliff tries to impress Denise's friends by teaching them how to jitterbug. Some of Clair's friends also show off their dance moves. Soon, the whole house is full of dancers. Blair Underwood as Denise's boyfriend (uncredited), Judith Jamison as Marie, Donald McKayle as Ralph, Gerard Cooper as Guy, Christine Langner as Girl

22 min

17

Theo and the Joint

Clair discovers a marijuana joint in one of Theo's school books. She and Cliff confront him about it, and accept his explanation—another boy slipped it in. Theo confronts the boy and brings him home to confess in order to remove any uncertainty from his parents about his telling the truth. Theo and the boy actually start to become friends. Stephen Thompson as Anthony Braxton, Iman as Mrs. Montgomery. Rudy says her full name in this episode, Rudith Lillian Huxtable.

22 min

18

Vanessa's New Class

Vanessa is placed in an advanced science class. She creates a model of the solar system, but learns that she will have to work harder than ever if she hopes to succeed. First appearance of Pam Potillo as Vanessa's friend Janet Meisner.

22 min

19

Clair's Case

A sneaky mechanic tries to swindle Sondra. It's Clair to the rescue as the two battle in court. David Langston Smyrl as the man in court, Shawn Elliott as Mr. Wilson, Alan North as Judge

22 min

20

Back to the Track, Jack

Cliff's college track coach contacts him and asks to run in a charity event between Hillman and its rival, Norton College. Heathcliff "Combustible Huxtable" trains, but soon learns that he is not the runner he was all those years ago.

22 min

21

The Younger Woman

Cliff and Clair receive a visit from an old friend—and he has a new girlfriend that is half his age. They are initially suspicious, but learn that judging by appearances isn't always right.

22 min

22

Slumber Party

Rudy invites all of her friends over for a slumber party. It's Cliff's job to watch over them, and he demonstrates some unique games to wrangle the youngsters. In the end, Russell drops by and demonstrates the perfect way to deal with kids-bribe them!

22 min

23

Mr. Quiet

Cliff, Clair, and the Huxtable clan volunteer at a local community center. There, a battered boy tries to find help, and the owner—Tony Castillo—does his best to lend assistance.

22 min

24

Cliff's Birthday

Cliff is turning 48, and as usual, he is trying to find out what his birthday present is ahead of time. Clair, with the help of the kids, orchestrates a huge trick. Cliff is fooled, and doesn't find about what is birthday surprise is: a visit to Lena Horne's private club. Lena Horne as herself, Clarence Williams III as Clarence Thornehill. In episode 12, Cliff says his birthday is in October.

22 min