Silly Songs with Larry Season 1, Episode 15: Schoolhouse Polka

1

The Water Buffalo Song

"The Water Buffalo Song" (Where's God When I'm S-Scared?) Written by Phil Vischer in 1993 – Wearing an oversized cowboy hat, Larry comes out and sings that "everybody's got a water buffalo," until Archibald Asparagus brings the song to an abrupt end and critiques Larry over the falseness of his lyrics. Larry then starts singing that "everybody's got a baby kangaroo," which makes Archibald so exasperated he charges at Larry and knocks him off the screen.

1 min

2

The Hairbrush Song

"The Hairbrush Song" (Are You My Neighbor?) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 1995 – Larry, wearing a towel and having recently emerged from the bathtub, rues the mysterious loss of his hairbrush while hopping and dancing around in the bathroom. Pa Grape and Junior Asparagus try to help him, but it is Bob the Tomato who finally solves the mystery. "The Hairbrush Song" marks the first of many cameo appearances by The Peach, which has become a running gag for the series.

3 min

3

Dance of the Cucumber

"Dance of the Cucumber" (Rack, Shack, and Benny) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 1995 – Larry, dressed up in Argentenian garb, sings and dances to a traditional ballad "in its original Spanish," while Bob, in a sheriff's hat, translates. Bob becomes frustrated, however, when Larry begins to taunt him because Bob cannot dance and sing. This gets to the point in which Bob eventually snaps and chases Larry off the set. Larry, meanwhile, hopes Bob does not catch him.

3 min

4

Love My Lips

"Love My Lips" (Dave and the Giant Pickle) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 1996 – Larry visits his psychiatrist (played by Archibald) worried about losing his lips. Because his focus on his lips is so absolute, he sees everything as a lip when given a Rorschach test.

3 min

5

Oh, Santa!

"Oh, Santa!" (The Toy That Saved Christmas) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 1996 – While awaiting the arrival of Santa Claus on Christmas Eve, Larry is visited by a bank robber (Scallion #1), a viking (Pa Grape), and an IRS agent (the Peach), whom Larry shares his cookies with (except the IRS agent). When Santa (Bob) arrives, however, it is revealed that Larry's remaining two guests have stolen parts of his outfit and he is fed up with it, chasing the two off the set. Larry gives the IRS agent the last cookie and says "Merry... Christmas" (presumably either to Santa or the IRS agent) and ends the song by staring at the viewer.

5 min

6

The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything

"The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything" (Very Silly Songs!) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 1997 – The "infamous" pirates (played by Larry, Mr. Lunt, and Pa Grape) sing of their lack of ambition, but Larry does not seem to grasp the concept of the song.

3 min

7

Song of the Cebú

"Song of the Cebú" (Josh and the Big Wall!) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 1997 – In a "sequential image, stereophonic, multimedia event" (a.k.a. a slide projector and a bed sheet), Larry presents the audience (Junior and the Gourds) with a song and slide show about a boy who owns three Cebús and a hippo, though due to an error by the Photo Booth Larry occasionally dives off-topic, leading Archibald to continually critique the presentation. As Junior and the two Gourds (Jimmy and Jerry) leave, Jimmy and Jerry talk about wanting their money back and how unfulfilling the presentation was.

4 min

8

His Cheeseburger

"His Cheeseburger" (Madame Blueberry) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 1998 – Larry is about to introduce a new Silly Song when Archibald announces the cancellation of his segment as a result of the disastrous outcome of the Song of the Cebu. He then gives Mr. Lunt a chance to sing a song in his own segment, Love Songs with Mr. Lunt. During the segment, Mr. Lunt sings of Jerry Gourd's unrequited love for a cheeseburger in this homage to typical rock 'n' roll ballads. At Archibald's assumption Mr. Lunt was going to sing about "growing up in Connecticut," Mr. Lunt clarifies he "grew up in New Jersey."

3 min

9

The Yodeling Veterinarian of the Alps

"The Yodeling Veterinarian of the Alps" (The End of Silliness?) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 1998 – Larry introduces this Silly Song after getting his Silly Songs with Larry segment back following a petition. Narrated in song by a barbershop quartet (consisting of the Scallions and Frankencelery), Larry is portrayed as a veterinarian who believes he is able to cure sick pets simply by yodeling to them. Meanwhile, his nurse (Pa Grape) is slipping prescriptions to the pets' owners behind his back. After refusing to give the nurse a raise, Larry realizes the painful truth of the inadequacy of his singing when a bear stuck in a trap is entirely unaffected by his 'treatment' and runs amok.

4 min

10

Endangered Love

"Endangered Love" aka Barbara Manatee (King George and the Ducky) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2000 – While watching the television soap opera, "Endangered Love", Larry sings of his love for the main character, a manatee, while dancing with a stuffed manatee doll. Meanwhile, onscreen, the story of lovers Barbara and Bill is told. However, the song is abruptly stopped when Bob interrupts Larry mid-song and suggests he read a book.

3 min

11

Larry's High Silk Hat

"Larry's High Silk Hat" (Lyle the Kindly Viking) Written by Marc Vulcano in 2001 – A new Silly Song is about to be introduced when Archibald intervenes and interrupts the segment, calling on the French Peas Philippe and Jean-Claude, who slide in the title card for a segment simply known as Classy Songs with Larry, before he begins introducing the new segment. During the new segment, Archibald and Larry sing to the tune of Funiculì, Funiculà, while Larry expresses his joy at having a lovely stovepipe hat and a box of chocolates while sitting at a trolley stop having to contend with nosy people (Art Bigotti, Mr. Nezzer, Miss Achmetha, Apollo Gourd, and Scallion #1) in the hot sun.

4 min

12

Do the Moo Shoo

"Do the Moo Shoo" (The Ultimate Silly Song Countdown) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2001 – Prompted by technical difficulties during their countdown special, Larry and Mr. Lunt find inspiration for a new silly song in the Chinese food menu.

1 min

13

Belly Button

"Belly Button" (The Ballad of Little Joe) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2003 – In the introduction to this song, the boy band "Boyz in the Sink" (Mr. Lunt, Larry, Jimmy Gourd, and Junior Asparagus) dramatically state their intent to be "serious" artists. During the song, Mr. Lunt admits that he lacks a bellybutton and he goes to the hospital to see the doctor and the nurse (Khalil the Caterpillar and Miss Achmetha) for help. The song is a direct parody of O-Town, and the band itself is named after Boyz n the Hood. This is the first Silly Song to not be shot on the normal countertop stage.

3 min

14

Sport Utility Vehicle

"Sport Utility Vehicle" (A Snoodle's Tale) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2004 – Larry and Miss Achmetha sing of their admiration for each other's SUV's, but stuck in their sedentary lifestyles, they can only dream of going off-road and performing daring rescues.

3 min

15

Schoolhouse Polka

"Schoolhouse Polka" (Sumo of the Opera) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2004 – Presented as "Schoolhouse Polka with Larry". In a parody of the Schoolhouse Rock! series, Larry plays the accordion and sings a song about homophones to the tune of the title song from the play/movie "Oklahoma!". However, he gets exhausted and tries to go off-screen, but the announcer keeps bringing him back to sing more.

2 min

16

The Blues with Larry

"The Blues with Larry" (Duke and the Great Pie War) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2005 – Larry enthusiastically tries his hand at singing the Blues but lacks the necessary life experiences as his version of the Blues is filled with sunshine and happiness. A professional Blues singer named Blind Lemon Lincoln tries to help by making Larry sad so he will get it right, but there is always something that makes Larry happy again. A frustrated Lemon eventually gives up, and the song ends with Larry joining a polka player, Oscar The Polish Caterer.

4 min

17

Pizza Angel

"Pizza Angel" (Minnesota Cuke and the Search for Samson's Hairbrush) Written by Tim Hodge in 2005 – Larry is awaiting his pizza delivery, which is hours late, and sings a desperate, 1950s-style, love ballad as he waits. When the pizza finally comes, the box is empty. The pizza delivery guy (played by Jimmy Gourd) explains that he was unable to locate Larry's house because the address number on Larry's door was broken and that he also ate Larry's pizza out of gluttony.

4 min

18

My Baby Elf

"My Baby Elf" (Lord of the Beans) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2005 – presented as "Silly Songs with Elves, the part of the show where Ear-a-Corn comes out and sings a Silly Song for Elves". Ear-a-Corn (Larry, dressed as Elvis Presley with elf ears) sings a song about an elvish girl, whose disdain for Ear-a-Corn is mistranslated by him as compliments. Leg-o-Lamb (Jimmy Gourd) interrupts near the end, pulling Ear-a-Corn's fake ears off and accusing Ear-a-Corn of being an "elvish impersonator".

3 min

19

Gated Community

"Gated Community" (Sheerluck Holmes and the Golden Ruler) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2006 – Larry's ball bounces over the wall of a gated community. Instead of helping him, the residents of the community sing about how lovely life is there, much to Larry's irritation and annoyance. The song ends with the residents finally throwing the ball back.

3 min

20

Lance the Turtle

"Lance the Turtle" (Gideon Tuba Warrior) Written by Tim Hodge in 2006 – With Larry dressed as a pirate, the French Peas force Bob to stand in with a replacement segment called "Ukulele Karaoke with Bob". Confused and completely unprepared, Bob sings the lyrics to his backup singers, "The Wiggly Turtle Toobies" (a trio of peas perched on turtle-shaped cut-outs). Just as Bob is starting to enjoy the song, he accidentally shreds his script through a fan, forcing the Peas to hastily tape the script back together – thus creating completely nonsensical lyrics.

3 min

21

A Mess Down in Egypt

"A Mess Down in Egypt" (Moe and the Big Exit) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2007 - The Boyz in the Sink return and interrupt the Silly Songs with Larry narrator to allow them to tell the Moses story in their own way. However, Bob comes in and tells them that the show is sticking with its own Western version of the story.

2 min

22

Monkey

"Monkey" (The Wonderful Wizard of Ha's) Written by Andrew Peterson and Randall Goodgame in 2007 – While on a photo safari, Larry continually repeats what he heard from an "expert" about the difference between monkeys and apes ("if it has a tail then it's a monkey, if it doesn't have a tail then it's an ape"), applying such logic to everything he sees. Bob repeatedly tries to correct Larry, but after Larry mistakenly identifies a cow as a monkey, Bob gives up in frustration.

3 min

23

The Biscuit of Zazzamarandabo

"The Biscuit of Zazzamarandabo" (Tomato Sawyer and Huckleberry Larry's Big River Rescue) Written by Andrew Peterson and Randall Goodgame in 2008 – When Larry forgets to write a silly song, Archibald jumps in with a song of his own. In the song, Larry, Archibald, Pa Grape, Mr. Lunt, and the French Peas go on a journey to see the famed "Biscuit of Zazzamarandabo." However, Larry (the driver) is constantly stopping to get something, frustrating Archibald. After a long journey (in which they first accidentally end up at the "Biscuit of Doug") and with 0.01 miles left to the Biscuit of Zazzamarandabo, they turn around to take a "potty break", with the nearest restroom 57 miles in the opposite direction. In the end, when they cue the title card, Larry comments to Archibald: "I always thought you were the announcer." Archibald replies, "So did I..."

4 min

24

Sneeze if You Need To

"Sneeze if You Need To!" (Abe and the Amazing Promise) Written by Andrew Peterson and Randall Goodgame in 2009 – Bob needs to sneeze and visits the Sneeze Doctor (Larry) who tries multiple methods (potpourri, flowers, bright light, a bowling ball, and a toilet plunger) to get Bob to sneeze. Eventually, a cat comes along, which makes Bob sneeze. He is relieved, but then starts sneezing uncontrollably. Meanwhile, the nurse (Mr. Lunt) shares trivia about sneezing.

3 min

25

Sippy Cup

"Sippy Cup" (Minnesota Cuke and the Search for Noah's Umbrella) Written by Steve Taylor and Mike Nawrocki in 2009 – Larry goes to a fancy restaurant and asks for a glass of grape juice. The waiter (Mr. Lunt) refuses because Larry has spilled grape juice several times in the past and ultimately forces Larry to use a sippy cup. Larry tries to argue his case with the waiter, busboy (Jimmy), and maître d' (Madame Blueberry), but they insist that Larry use the sippy cup. When a courtroom judge (Mr. Nezzer) is about to pass the sippy cup sentence, the governor calls in and says that Larry can have his grape juice in a glass, which he promptly spills. When the title card appears again, Larry says he will take the sippy cup.

3 min

26

Donuts for Benny

"Donuts for Benny" (Saint Nicholas: A Story of Joyful Giving) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2009 – Presented as "Helpful Humanitarian Songs with Mr. Lunt." Mr. Lunt sings about Benny, a poor old mutt who sits outside a donut shop and begs for donuts. At Mr. Lunt's urging, passersby keep giving Benny donuts, but Mr. Lunt learns the hard ways that dogs should not be fed donuts when Benny twice gives a hyperactive rendition of "Waltz Me Around Again, Willie".

3 min

27

Where Have All the Staplers Gone?

"Where Have All the Staplers Gone?" (Pistachio - The Little Boy That Woodn't) Written by Mike Nawrocki and Kurt Heniecke in 2010 – Presented as "Obscure Broadway Show Tunes with Larry", Larry and Petunia lament the displacement of various office supplies and reminisce about the time when they were plentiful in this parody of the folk song "Where Have All the Flowers Gone?". In the end, the narrator promotes Act 2, "Revenge of the Staplers".

3 min

28

Pants

"Pants" (Sweetpea Beauty) Written by Ian Eskelin and Douglas McKelvey in 2010 – Presented as a "Veggie Shopping Network" infomercial. Larry and Pa Grape sell pants to viewers while Jimmy and Jerry Gourd show them off on stilts.

2 min

29

Goodnight Junior

"Goodnight Junior" (It's a Meaningful Life) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2010 – Presented as "Bedtime Songs with Junior". Junior is revealed to be a rather spoiled little brat, as he proceeds to continuously and unreasonably nag Mom Asparagus to get him everything he "needs" for bedtime.

3 min

30

The Hopperena

"The Hopperena" (Twas The Night Before Easter) Written by Kurt Heinecke and Mike Nawrocki in 2011 – Presented as "The Latest Dance Craze with Jean-Claude and Philippe", the French Peas invent a new dance craze (a spoof of the Macarena), which Archibald becomes a big fan of.

3 min

31

Astonishing Wigs!

"Astonishing Wigs!" (Princess and the Popstar) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2011 – In an installment of "The History of Fashion with Archibald", Archibald, Madame Blueberry, Jimmy Gourd, Mr. Lunt, and a pack of singing pigs sing about wigs. This song loosely ties to the feature by occurring after a scene where Princess Poppyseed and popstar Vanna Banana exchange clothes, including Vanna's wig, in a vain attempt to switch lives.

3 min

32

The Eight Polish Foods of Christmas

"The Eight Polish Foods of Christmas" (The Little Drummer Boy) Written by Mike Nawrocki (recorded in 1996, animated in 2011)– At "A VeggieTales Christmas Party", Oscar the Polish Caterer arrives to serve his filling cuisine (sung to "The 12 Days of Christmas"). Originally recorded for the "A Very Veggie Christmas" album, this is its first appearance in video form.

5 min

33

Bubble Rap

"Bubble Rap" (Robin Good and The Not-So-Merry Men and If I Sang a Silly Song) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2012 – The Boyz in the Sink perform a song about the wonders of bubble wrap.

3 min

34

Best Friends Forever

"Best Friends Forever" (The Penniless Princess) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2012 – Laura and another girl text each other about being friends forever.

2 min

35

Supper Hero

"Supper Hero" (The League of Incredible Vegetables) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2012 – Jimmy Gourd (dressed as the Supper Hero) eats the whole league's supper (including their chocolate cake).

2 min

36

Happy Tooth Day

"Happy Tooth Day" – (The Little House that Stood) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2013 – Larry sings about having his one tooth and has a celebration for the tooth.

3 min

37

Kilts and Stilts

"Kilts and Stilts" (MacLarry and the Stinky Cheese Battle) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2013 – Larry and Scooter interrupt the narrator to begin a segment of "Silly Songs with Scottish Larry". The song begins Larry standing on stilts while singing in a Scottish accent, while Scottish food, music, quilting, and kilts are also mentioned. However, the French Peas interrupt the song to change the background, prompting Larry and his friends to sing similar verses about Ireland, England and the United States, much to the dismay of Scooter, who eventually faints.

2 min

38

Wrapped Myself Up for Christmas

"Wrapped Myself Up for Christmas" (Merry Larry and the Light of Christmas) Written by Mike Nawrocki and Kurt Heinecke in 2013 – Larry accidentally wraps himself, Bob, Jean-Claude, Phillipe, and Pa Grape in wrapping paper. Junior unwraps them (with the exception of Pa, who remains unseen until the end of the Silly Song).

3 min

39

Asteroid Cowboys

"Asteroid Cowboys" (Veggies in Space: The Fennel Frontier) Written by Mike Nawrocki in 2014 – Larry, Junior, and Jimmy sing about their lives as asteroid herders.

3 min

40

Perfect Puppy

"Perfect Puppy" (Celery Night Fever) Written by Len Uhley, Dave Kinnoin, and Jimmy Hammer in 2014 – Larry wants a puppy but is having a hard time deciding what breed is perfect for him. He is taken to the kennel by Bob and ends up choosing a puppy which bears a strange resemblance to himself.

3 min

41

Mac and Cheese

"Mac and Cheese" (Beauty and the Beet) Written by Dave Kinnoin and Jimmy Hammer in 2014 – A parody of Romeo and Juliet. Larry describes in the operatic form how his Italian ancestors, the rival Cucaroni and Cumbarizzi families, invented Macaroni and Cheese when his great (etc.) grandmother Maria, and great (etc.) grandfather Tony, accidentally crashed their cheese and macaroni carts into each other.

3 min

42

My Golden Egg

"My Golden Egg" (Noah's Ark) Written by Len Uhley, Dave Kinnoin, and Jimmy Hammer in 2015 – An Easter egg hunt is enjoyed by Junior, [is that supposed to be] Laura, and Larry. Larry sings about a special golden egg that he wants to find by imagining himself on a jungle adventure. Laura finds the Golden egg first, but she shares her egg with Larry in the end. Note: This is the only Silly Song to use the creepy characters from Netflix.

3 min