I Love Lucy Season 2, Episode 22: No Children Allowed

1

Job Switching

Ricky wants Lucy to try working for a week, so she and Ethel get jobs at a candy factory, where they are totally inept-especially at wrapping chocolates-due to a speeding conveyor belt that has them stuffing chocolates in their mouths, blouses, and hats.

24 min

2

The Saxophone

When Lucy fails her saxophone audition for Ricky's band, she tries to stop him from going on the road by pretending there's another man in her life. Ricky gets back at her by hiring several "lovers," and hiding them in Lucy's closet. But Lucy gets the last laugh in the end!

25 min

3

The Anniversary Present

Lucy thinks that Ricky is pitching woo with a sophisticated neighbor. The woman is actually a jeweler who Ricky has commissioned to fashion a pearl necklace to surprise Lucy with on their anniversary. Lucy takes to spying before the deal can go down and almost loses out on her big surprise.

25 min

4

The Handcuffs

After Lucy snaps a pair of antique handcuffs on herself and Ricky, they realize there's no key. A locksmith is found, but not before the Ricardos go to bed handcuffed together, and Ricky has to do a TV show with his "attached" wife trying to upstage him.

24 min

5

The Operetta

Lucy's women's club wants to stage an operetta, but they're completely broke. (Lucy, the treasurer, seems to have spent it all to pay her own bills.) Thus, Lucy and Ethel write and star in the musical, but when their postdated check bounces for the costumes and scenery, the rental company repossesses everything in midperformance.

24 min

6

Vacation from Marriage

The Ricardos and the Mertzes take a week off from their in-a-rut marriages. But each spouse misses the other too much, and despite a last-ditch attempt to make each other jealous, they all decide that they'd rather be in a rut with their mates.

25 min

7

The Courtroom

The Ricardos give the Mertzes a television set for their anniversary, but Ricky's zealous tuning causes it to blow up. Fred retaliates by breaking the Ricardos' set (by kicking it!) The foursome end up in court, where they manage to destroy the judge's TV, too!

25 min

8

Redecorating

Waiting to find out if she has won a home furnishing contest, Lucy won't leave the house, much to Ricky's annoyance. He tells Fred to call her and say that she's won. In her joy, Lucy sells all the old furniture, leaving Ricky with the job of buying it back.

25 min

9

Ricky Loses His Voice

Ricky's laryngitis makes it impossible for him to perform in a big reopening show for the Tropicana. So Lucy substitutes herself, the ex-vaudivillian Mertzes, and a chorus line of middle-aged showgirls from the Flapper Follies of 1927. Look for Barbara Pepper as one of the showgirls.

25 min

10

Lucy Is Enceinte

Lucy is delighted to learn she is pregnant-but how to tell Ricky? At lunch, he's too preoccupied with work to listen to her, then it's off to the club-where Lucy finds the right moment and just the right way to tell him.

25 min

11

Pregnant Women are Unpredictable

Lucy thinks Ricky cares more about the baby they're having than about her, especially after he buys her presents like bonnets and rattles. But when he takes her out for a night on the town, she thinks he's lost interest in the baby.

26 min

12

Lucy's Showbiz Swan Song

Despite her pregnancy, Lucy wants to appear in Ricky's Gay Nineties revue at the Tropicana. After a disastrous audition, Lucy disguises herself and sneaks into the barbershop quartet number, and then proceeds to ruin it.

23 min

13

Lucy Hires an English Tutor

Lucy hires an English tutor so that Ricky won't give their yet-to-be-born baby bad speaking habits. The lessons are free, but Lucy does promise the tutor a payback: he'll get to sing at the Tropicana. Of course, Lucy neglects to tell Ricky this.

25 min

14

Ricky Has Labor Pains

Ricky develops "labor pains" because he is jealous of the attention being lavished on the expectant Lucy. So she decides to throw him a "daddy shower," which Fred turns into a "stag party," which Lucy and Ethel crash.

26 min

15

Lucy Becomes a Sculptress

Lucy decides to explore her artistic side and takes up sculpting.

25 min

16

Lucy Goes to the Hospital

Ricky and the Mertzes rehearse for pregnant Lucy's trip to the hospital. It turns out to be predictably chaotic, but Lucy does deliver Little Ricky.

25 min

17

Sales Resistance

Convinced his wife is a sucker for a sales pitch, Ricky demands that she return the vacuum cleaner she bought from a door-to-door salesman. Instead, she tries (unsuccessfully) to sell it. Ricky insists that he'll return it-and ends up buying a refrigerator.

26 min

18

The Inferiority Complex

When no one laughs at her jokes or wants her to be their bridge partner, Lucy comes to the conclusion that she is inferior to everyone else. Worried by Lucy's behavior, Ricky goes to the psychiatrist (or "fizz-a-key-a-tryst" as Ricky pronounces it,) to find the remedy. But it turns out that this doctor's "remedy" isn't exactly what Ricky had in mind.

26 min

19

The Club Election

Because they both want to be president of the Wednesday Afternoon Fine Arts League, Lucy and Ethel both engage in cut-throat competition. Prior to the elections, Lucy and Ethel independently engage in a little "spywork." It seems that half the club plans on voting for Lucy and the other half plans to vote for Ethel. But there is one undecided vote--that of the new member, Ruth Knickerbocker. So Lucy and Ethel both go to extremes to sway Knickerbocker's vote.

26 min

20

The Black Eye

Lucy misses catching a book tossed to her by Ricky, and winds up with a black eye that Fred and Ethel are convinced was intentional. Trying to patch things up for the Ricardos, Fred sends Lucy flowers, but inadvertently uses his own name instead of Ricky's.

26 min

21

Lucy Changes Her Mind

Whether it's getting dressed or ordering dinner at a restaurant, Lucy seems unable to finish anything without changing her mind. Ricky loses his temper, so Lucy tries to play a trick with an old, unfinished love letter to a beau from high school. Fred warns Ricky of Lucy's plot, and Lucy is soon in over her head.

26 min

22

No Children Allowed

When a cranky tenant (Elizabeth Patterson, in her first appearance as Mrs. Trumble,) threatens to move because of Little Ricky's loud crying, Ethel makes it clear that her friendship with Lucy is more important than a rental agreement. But Ethel doesn't let the Ricardos forget her loyalty.

25 min

23

Lucy Hires a Maid

Lucy's sleepless nights with the new baby are exhausting, so the Ricardos hire a maid. Unfortunately, this new maid turns out to be a terrible shrew, who takes better care of herself than of Lucy or the apartment. Unable to get the gumption to fire her, Lucy wrecks the apartment, hoping it will make the maid quit.

25 min

24

The Indian Show

Even the arrival of the baby hasn't dampened Lucy's showbiz aspirations. Wanting to get into the new Indian act at the Tropicana, Lucy pays off one of the performers and appears herself, carrying Little Ricky papoose-style on her back.

25 min

25

Lucy's Last Birthday

Convinced everyone has forgotten her birthday, a forlorn Lucy sits on a park bench and meets up with a group of musical "lost souls." To embarrass Ricky, she brings them to the Tropicana, only to discover that a surprise birthday party awaits her.

25 min

26

The Ricardos Change Apartments

Now that they have Little Ricky, Lucy insists they need more room, and wants to change apartments with one of the other tenants (Mrs. Benson.) She convinces a reluctant Ricky by cluttering their apartment with baby things and assorted junk.

25 min

27

Lucy Is Matchmaker

Lucy plays matchmaker when she meets a friend of the Mertzes (Hal March, as Eddie) who happens to be an eligible bachelor. His line of work? He's a lingerie salesman, a fact that just might get her (and Ethel) into trouble when her matchmaking efforts inevitably backfire.

26 min

28

Lucy Wants New Furniture

Lucy tries to hide some new furniture she bought without Ricky's permission in the kitchen. Discovering his wife's extravagant purchase, Ricky insists that Lucy pays for it from her allowance.

26 min

29

The Camping Trip

Lucy fears that she and Ricky don't have enough in common, so she decides to pursue one of his interests: camping. Ricky and Fred don't want her (or Ethel, for that matter,) horning in on their summer retreat, so Ricky decides to take Lucy on a "trial run" in the woods and make her life miserable. But Lucy is wise to his plan, and guess whose life is made miserable in the end?

26 min

30

Ricky and Fred are TV Fans

With Ricky and Fred glued to a TV fight, their wives go to the local cafe, where service is so slow that Lucy makes change for herself at the cash register and the girls are arrested. They finally prove their innocence and get home to husbands who didn't know they were gone.

25 min

31

Never Do Business With Friends

The Ricardos sell their old washing machine to the Mertzes for $35. When it breaks down the next day, the Mertzes want out of the deal. A tug-of-war ensues, however, when the Mertzes want the machine back after a repairman offers them $50 for it.

26 min