Petticoat Junction Season 1, Episode 14: Cannonball Christmas

1

Spur Line to Shady Rest

Homer Bedloe, trouble-shooter for the C&F W Railroad, is sent by railroad president Norman P. Curtis to the little community of Hooterville to find out why a branch line doesn't connect with the main line. The branch line carries the "Cannonball" train, and is vital to the Shady Rest Hotel, run by Kate Bradley, her three grown daughters and "Uncle Joe" Carson. If Bedloe succeeds in shutting down the Cannonball, Kate faces ruin. John Ashley appears as passenger Fred.

25 min

2

Quick, Hide the Railroad

Kate uses a combination of charm, subterfuge, and wiles to prevent Homer Bedloe from catching the Hooterville Cannonball and getting to Pixley in order to initiate proceedings that would permanently terminate the train's operation. She has to keep him at the Shady Rest long enough to convince him that the Cannonball is an integral part of the valley's life. When all else fails, Kate gets Sam, the Hooterville Jack of all professions, to scare Bedloe into changing his mind.

25 min

3

The President Who Came to Dinner

C&F W Railroad President Norman P. Curtis is incensed that ace troubleshooter Homer Bedloe utterly failed to scrap the Hooterville Cannonball. Taking matters into his own hands, he decides to do it himself, incognito. Although Curtis doesn't intend on appearing as such, he comes across to Kate and others in the valley as a hobo after he takes a tumble in a field, ripping and dirtying his suit and losing his wallet in the process. But, he has a change of heart when he experiences Kate's hospitality and kindness.

25 min

4

Is There a Doctor in the Roundhouse?

Norman Curtis, who has fallen in love with life at the Shady Rest, is still staying there for free without Kate yet knowing his true identity. He accidentally breaks the throttle handle of the Hooterville Cannonball and folks can't get to Kate's annual Shady Rest Jamboree. Norman decides to come clean about his identity. The problem is no one believes him. In fact, they all believe he's crazy. But the executive tries to make amends with a determined effort to obtain the nearly-nonexistent replacement part. Norman brings three of his friends in to help, who everyone also think are hobos. Thanks to Norman, the Jamboree is a success.

25 min

5

The Courtship of Floyd Smoot

Floyd Smoot, the conductor, is courting a woman through the mail. But, when she ends it after receiving a photo of him, he loses all confidence. Kate tries to help him think all the women from Hooterville and the surrounding area have eyes for him, but instead he gets the idea that Kate has been secretly in love with him. Kate comes up with a plan to get Flyod's mind off of her. Meanwhile, the Hooterville Hornets football team and their coach Uncle Joe are on a losing streak.

25 min

6

Please Buy My Violets

Uncle Joe spends Kate's money to buy cases of lousy smelling men and women's cologne to make a fast buck reselling it. The money was intended to put screens in the hotel that will keep mosquitoes from chasing away paying guests. Kate figures out a way to sell all the cologne to salesmen Mr. Blake and Mr. Gordon. The men are going to sell it as insecticide.

25 min

7

The Ringer

Betty Jo enters the annual Shady Rest Horseshoe Tournament and becomes the first female contestant in the tournament's history. But she experiences conflicting emotions when she finds herself with an opportunity to defeat the legendary Pixley Fats. After a talk with Kate, Betty Jo decides that winning means more to Pixley Fats than to her, because that's all he really has in life.

25 min

8

Kate's Recipe for Hot Rhubarb

When Billie Jo has to come up with a fourth for her double date with Junior Hocker and Junior's visiting friend Roger Budd, Kate suggests Bobbie Jo to her. Billie Jo doesn't think Bobbie Jo would be a good fit as she knows all the boys see Bobbie Jo as a book worm instead of a fun girl. Convincing Bobbie Jo may be more difficult as Bobbie Jo admits that she just doesn't feel comfortable around boys yet. She goes on the date, but comes home early saying she just can't compete with Billie Jo. Kate tries to teach Bobbie Jo how to flatter a man the way Billie Jo does. On her next date with Roger, things go much better.

25 min

9

The Little Train Robbery

Two young men, Arthur Gilroy and Lowell Rightmeyer, are on their way to rob the bank in Pixley. They change their plans when they learn that the next day, the Cannonball, without any armed guards, will make its run from Hooterville to Pixley for the bank shipment. Arthur and Lowell decide to stay the night at the Shady Rest. Kate and the family are happy to have two polite and handsome young men stay with them. Arthur and Lowell do hold up the train the next day. But, Kate and Uncle Joe are also on the train and they recognize the masked bandits. When Arthur and Lowell learn that the bank shipment is only deposit slips, they decide to rob the Shady Rest instead. But will Kate, her family, Charley and Floyd be able to turn around Arthur and Lowell's criminal lives?

25 min

10

Bedloe Strikes Again

The Cannonball and its primary passenger, Uncle Joe, are pelted with eggs after the Hooterville Hornets, coached by Uncle Joe, are drubbed in what may be their worst game ever. Another unexpected passenger on that run is Homer Bedloe, who is surprisingly cordial and pleasant. Uncle Joe doesn't see anything wrong with Bedloe being cordial and taking it like a man in defeat in his efforts to scrap the Cannonball. Kate on the other hand believes Bedloe is up to no good. News gets to Sam that John Fisher and Max Thornton, two bigwigs from the railroad, are coming for a surprise inspection the following day. When Kate learns this news, they have to go clean-up the Cannonball. Plus, they have to keep Bedloe preoccupied so that he won't know what they're up to. And third, they have to railroad the visiting bigwigs about how deluxe the service on the Cannonball is. Fisher and Thornton are very impressed with the service.

25 min

11

Uncle Joe's Replacement

Kate and the girls go to Drucker's store to pick up the pocket watch they ordered for Uncle Joe's birthday present. While there Kate, in an effort to boost Herby's confidence, inadvertently offers him a job as Assistant Manager at the hotel. Now Kate doesn't have the heart not to give him the job, so she decides that she can give him some menial tasks at the hotel. Uncle Joe believes he is being put out to pasture with Herby showing up. He goes in search of another job. He gets one, telling everyone that he is an executive with some large company. Kate follows him and finds out his big job is actually mopping floors in a cafe. Kate and Sam have to figure out a way to get both Herby and Uncle Joe back to their real jobs.

25 min

12

Honeymoon Hotel

Uncle Joe has come up with another scheme to attract guests to the hotel: advertise it as a wedding/honeymoon destination. Uncle Joe manages to get Sam, the county judge, to swear him in as temporary Justice of the Peace before Sam goes away on a hunting vacation at Lost Lake. All Uncle Joe has to do is file the documentation at the courthouse to make it legal. After Uncle Joe performs his first wedding, for a young couple named Walter Shepherd and Elsie Gregg, Uncle Joe realizes that he forgot to file the documentation at the courthouse. Kate and the gang do what they can to stall Walter and Elsie consummating what they believe is their marriage, while Uncle Joe searches for Sam.

25 min

13

A Night at the Hooterville Hilton

A brochure made by Uncle Joe describing the incomparable Shady Rest Hotel of the future is accidentally mailed to The Centerville Sun Express travel columnist Gladys Stroud. In the brochure was the vision of what he hoped the hotel would one day be, including indoor ice rink, bowling alley, and swimming pool. Gladys decides to come and review the Shady Rest. Now the family has to scramble to keep her from finding out the truth and closing them down for lying. Despite their best efforts, Gladys finds out. Uncle Joe manages to sweet talk Gladys into not closing them down.

25 min

14

Cannonball Christmas

The Bradleys, Sam Drucker, Herby, Charlie and Floyd are decorating the Cannonball for its annual Christmas Eve trip of caroling, gift-giving and merriment around the valley. But, Homer Bedloe is determined to be a Scrooge and take possession of the train on Christmas Eve. Railroad President Norman Curtis finds out what Bedloe is up to and goes to Hooterville to stop him.

25 min

15

Herbie Gets Drafted

Herby is depressed when he gets drafted, so the girls cheer him up by suggesting he could be an astronaut. Uncle Joe hears this and decides he needs to promote Herby's future political career to the whole town. When Herby gets a discharge for minor medical problems, Kate finds a way for him to save face with Billie Jo and the rest.

25 min

16

Bobbie Jo and the Beatnik

Bobbie Jo brings home Alan Landman, a mad-at-the-world young poet and slacker who has won her heart. Despite Bobbie Jo liking him in every respect, he dismisses her way of life. Bobbie Jo wants to prove him wrong, while deep down she wants to find out for herself if Alan is really right about how meaningless her conventional life is. The family's impression of Alan is quite dismal. Kate has to figure out a way to make Bobbie Jo come to the conclusion on her own that Alan and his life do not deserve to be romanticized.

25 min

17

My Daughter the Doctor

Billie Jo receives a $500 insurance endowment, which her late father set aside for his first-born to become a doctor. But Billie Jo wants to go to Hollywood to become an actress. Kate thinks that Hooterville's long time doctor, Dr. Depew, can talk Billie Jo into it. But Kate's thinks that Dr. Depew's handsome new assistant, Dr. Clayton Harris, would be able to convince Billie Jo even more. So using Uncle Joe as a patient with non-existing symptoms, Kate hopes to have Dr. Harris make a thorough examination with Billie Jo as his assistant, exposing her to the wonders of modern medicine. But, Billie Jo faints at the first sight of blood.

25 min

18

Hooterville vs. Hollywood

Billie Jo is still determined to use the $500 from her father to go to Hollywood to become a movie star. It doesn't help that Uncle Joe, who wants to go with her, is fueling her dream. Kate talks with Judge Drucker to see if she can legally prevent Billie Jo from going to Hollywood, but he advises against it. Dr. Depew believes Kate's mistake between Dr. Harris and Billie Jo was throwing them together in a professional relationship. He thinks they should throw them together in a doctor/patient relationship. First, they have to trick Billie Jo into thinking she's sick. Then, they have to get Dr. Harris to come by each day to check on her. Kate believes there is one more piece to complete the puzzle, courtesy of a fake edition of the Hooterville World Guardian.

25 min

19

Visit From a Big Star

Uncle Joe has made a deal with Lucy Wayne, the secretary of movie star Lane Haggard, for them to stay for two weeks at the Shady Rest. Incognito as Mr. Jones, Haggard, according to Miss Wayne, needs to get some rest and relaxation away from prying public eyes. But upon their arrival, Miss Wayne believes Uncle Joe has duped her. It seems that Joe has told the entire valley about their stay. Miss Wayne also wanted no attractive women around to fall under Haggard's movie idol charms. Kate and the girls are not quite as homely as Uncle Joe described them. The problem arises that those charms do surface without Haggard realizing what he is doing. The three girls, not used to such words from a big city man, believe what he tells each of them. But, the words are just niceties which he says to every attractive female. Kate tries to protect her girls and she also tries to help the one person to who those charms really do mean something, Lucy.

25 min

20

Last Chance Farm

Business is bad at the Shady Rest and Kate needs to make a $200 bank loan payment. Uncle Joe meets Henrietta Boswell and Gertrude Hawley, who are lost and looking for Madame Bovary's Hideaway Reducing Farm. He convinces them that the Shady Rest is the most exclusive reducing farm and charges them $200 for a week. The catch is that Uncle Joe provides them with a money back guarantee. Uncle Joe tries to hide from Kate why the women are staying at the hotel. With a rigged scale, Joe has to convince the two that the secret to weight loss is to eat whatever they want as long as it is combined with turnip greens. He also has them do what would normally be considered all his chores. Ultimately, the two women do whatever they can to find what they believe is Kate's miracle weight loss and youth secret.

25 min

21

The Very Old Antique

When Kate unexpectedly sees Homer Bedloe in Hooterville, she knows trouble is in store. Bedloe plans on selling the Cannonball, a seemingly one-of-a-kind antique locomotive. His buyer is millionaire retired train man and antique train aficionado, Phillip Waterhouse. Waterhouse is an old, ornery and snobbish man who generally gets what he wants. With Charley and Floyd's help, Kate hopes she can convince Waterhouse that the train is in such disrepair that it's not worth buying. Kate's plan backfires when she learns Waterhouse enjoys repairing old trains. She hopes that with the family's help, she can get through to Waterhouse the necessity of the train to the valley.

25 min

22

The Art Game

A traveling salesman guest leaves Uncle Joe a set of six paint-by-number canvases in lieu of a cash payment. Joe decides to take up painting and hopes to make money with his new venture. Mr. Cheever, an antique dealer, buys Joe's first painting. Joe now thinks he is a new art master on his way to success. However, the dealer only wanted the valuable picture frame. Before wrapping up the painting, Joe trades the frame for one he believes is nicer. News of the painting sale spreads throughout Hooterville. People come by to see Joe's other paintings, including E. T. Gibbs from a local museum. Gibbs hates the paintings, which depresses Joe. Cheever comes back to get the original frame he bought. Kate comes up with a plan for Cheever to get the frame and for Joe to feel better.

25 min

23

Betty Jo's First Love

Betty Jo has her first crush on a boy named Orville Miggs. But the object of her affections is more interested in tinkering with cars than he is in romance. As such, all Orville sees in Betty Jo is a mechanic's expert assistant. Kate doesn't want to see Betty Jo get hurt. Kate thinks he will see her in a different and more romantic light if she wears a dress and becomes a bit more feminine. But nothing they try makes Orville really notice Betty Jo, and ultimately give her her much wanted first kiss. If the family is able to accomplish their task, will Betty Jo ultimately think it was worth it?

25 min

24

Behind All Silver, There's a Cloud Lining

Homer Bedloe is back in Hooterville trying yet again to find a way to shut down the Cannonball. He believes there must be something in the financial books since Charley and Floyd have not submitted a report in twelve years. That plan ends up being more confusing to Bedloe than it's worth pursuing. Meanwhile, Uncle Joe is given the task of digging a drainage ditch down by the tracks. He finds the lazy way to do it by advertising that guests can dig for silver down by the tracks. He figures others will do the digging for him. Bedloe decides to sell leases all along the track from Hooterville to Pixley for people to prospect for silver. In the process, all the digging will just rip up the track, leaving the train unable to run without major repairs to the track. Kate can see through Bedloe's scheme and she devises a way to outsmart him once again to keep the Cannonball running.

25 min

25

The Talent Contest

A regional talent contest is being held in Hooterville with the winner being awarded $50 and a trip to Chicago for the television broadcast final. Kate worries that competition among the girls will affect the family. Uncle Joe has other thoughts where he wants the girls to compete their hearts out with the goal of winning. The girls agree in that they figure Kate could use the $50. With the ulterior motive of being the adult chaperon for his winning niece in going to Chicago for the final, Uncle Joe tries to convince all the credible competition not to enter the contest. Kate wants the contest to be fair and undoes all of Joe's scheming. After their performances, the girls decide they were only thinking of themselves and drop out of the competition.

25 min

26

Kate and the Manpower Problem

An old school chum named Emily Mapes thinks it's time Kate was married again. She tells the girls to round up some prospects to go to the Shady Rest to court Kate. The girls do this by offering special rates to single men. However, Uncle Joe thinks that if Kate finds a man, he will lose his job. Joe even pretends to be the house detective and tells guest Grover Woodstock to leave Kate alone. Kate finds out from Grover what her daughters have been up to. She comes up with a plan with all the men to teach her girls a lesson.

25 min

27

The Ladybugs

Beatlemania has hit Hooterville by storm. Uncle Joe recruits Billy, Bobbie, and Betty Joe along with their friend Sally Ragsdale to form their own band called the Ladybugs. Colonel Partridge, a booking agent, comes to the Shady Rest to see the girls in action. Partridge likes what he hears and wants to book the girls. Sally's father, Sheriff Ragsdale, comes by and says he wants his daughter to finish school and not tour the country. Uncle Joe thinks he has a way to save the group and dresses up as a Ladybug.

25 min

28

The Hooterville Flivverball

Uncle Joe gets angry at Charlie and Floyd when he is left behind by the Cannonball. He decides to start his own transport business by using Orville Miggs' "Flivverball", an old car converted into a railway car. At first the Flivverball is a success. Kate must now deal with the feuding groups before the Cannonball goes out of business.

25 min

29

Kate the Stockholder

Norman Curtis, President of the C&FW Railroad, is currently on vacation in Europe. He left instructions not to do anything to the Cannonball while he's gone. However, Homer Bedloe has a scheme to shut down the Cannonball for good. He hopes to do it without disobeying Curtis' orders. The plan entails Bedloe being appointed Superintendent of the Cannonball. He would then enforce an efficiency program with an impossible to meet new schedule. He expects Charley and Floyd will eventually just give up. Kate and the gang go to the stockholders meeting where she believes they've got a secret weapon to ruin Bedloe's plans.

25 min

30

Kate and the Dowager

Mr. Bunce with the bank is doing an inspection of the hotel and is not planning on extending Kate's financing. Wealthy socialite Clara Watkins checks into the hotel with her son Sonny. Bunce will only extend Kate's financing if Mrs. Watkins recommends the hotel to her friends. Meanwhile, annoying Sonny is constantly chasing after Billie Jo. Mrs. Watkins wants the two of them to get married. While Kate has done whatever she can to please Mrs. Watkins, she has to say no to that. Uncle Joe decides to romance Mrs. Watkins instead and she soon accepts his marriage proposal. Kate comes up with a plan to save Joe and the hotel.

25 min

31

Charley Abandons the Cannonball

Charley begins to believe that everyone seems too busy to spend any time with him. Floyd has started to call on the widow Sarah Lawrence. Uncle Joe has a speech he has to prepare, so has no time to go fishing with him. Kate has far too much work to do around the hotel. Charley doesn't want to spend his time alone and miserable running the Cannonball. He decides to quit and move to the big city. Kate tries to manufacture ways of keeping Charley in the valley before his replacement Bill Tuttle comes and takes over his job. When Charley realizes how much he is loved and needed, he finds a way to talk Tuttle out of staying.

25 min

32

Dog Days at Shady Rest

Kate receives a telegram from Railroad President Norman Curtis that he is sending Homer Bedloe with someone named Fred. Fred is actually Mr. Curtis' housekeeper's aged basset hound. Curtis believes Fred needs some good country air and space to re-energize himself. Curtis also hopes that Bedloe will soften his ways in the process. Bedloe comes up with the plan to "ruin" Fred and have him return to Curtis in worse shape than he arrived. That will hopefully sour Curtis' view of the Shady Rest and what it stands for. Kate figures out a way to bring back spirit to Fred and a way to break Bedloe's spirit.

25 min

33

A Millionaire for Kate

An old friend of Kate's from high school is coming for a visit. Kate admits that she had a crush on H.J. Grant back then. His letter implies that he is now wealthy, and is coming back to the valley on personal business. Uncle Joe, however, believes that Herbie is a con artist after Kate's money. Uncle Joe decides he needs to break up any chance of a romance between Kate and Herbie. Orville finds a newspaper article that proves Herbie is wealthy. Now Joe wants Kate to marry Herbie. But Kate and Herbie want to remain just friends.

25 min

34

Bedloe and Son

Homer Bedloe arrives at the Shady Rest with his son, Homer Bedloe Jr., who is as hateful and devious as his father. He even looks like his father down to the horn-rimmed glasses. Bedloe Sr.'s plan is that he wants to appear the loving and caring father, bringing his son up right. Then he will leave Jr. alone at the Shady Rest to snoop around and find a way to shut down the Shady Rest and the Cannonball for good. But Jr. comes to like everyone because he is treated with kindness and goodwill for no apparent reason.

25 min

35

Local Girl Makes Good

Business executive Mary Jane Hastings returns home to Hooterville to receive the Chamber of Commerce award. She commands attention just by her very presence, with everyone being at her beck and call. Kate doesn't like the effect Mary Jane has on her girls. Kate blames Mary Jane's assistant Steve, who is setting the example that what Mary Jane wants, she gets. Kate learns that Steve is in love with Mary Jane. Kate tells Steve he needs to stop being the ever obedient servant. But when Steve stands up to Mary Jane, she fires him. After learning that Mary Jane is in love with Steve, Kate finds a way to bring them back together.

25 min

36

Cave Woman

Uncle Joe wants to dig out an old cave to use as a wine cellar for the hotel. Kate receives a telegram from Brooks T. Webster, who wants to possibly hold a convention at the Shady Rest. He will be arriving that afternoon. Uncle Joe causes a landslide covering up the cave entrance with Kate inside the cave. They will need Ding Woodhouse's tractor to remove all the rubble to get Kate out. But Ding's tractor needs some work done on it and won't be ready until the morning. Mr. Webster arrives and insists on dinner, but Kate isn't there to cook. Uncle Joe comes up with a plan to feed Mr. Webster and get the convention business. But is Mr. Webster the only one they need to impress?

25 min

37

Kate Flat on Her Back

Kate has sprained her ankle which means she will be off her feet for three or four days. Now that Mr. Webster's gone, the family has to prepare for Mr. Feasel's visit. He is the one that will decide if the convention will be held at the Shady Rest. Uncle Joe decides to make some changes to the hotel he's sure will appeal to conventioneers. He also hires Smokey Harner, a country singer and guitarist. Hearing about all the new ideas, Kate believes Uncle Joe and the girls may be running the hotel better than she did. Mr. Feasel arrives early and is not impressed with anything about the hotel. Kate recovers quicker than Dr. John Rhone expected. But she wants to keep her recovery a secret because she thinks everything is running smoothly and wants the family to feel good about themselves. With everything going wrong in the hotel, Mr. Feasel leaves. Kate finds out that Feasel has left. But he later returns for a very unusual reason.

25 min

38

The Genghis Keane Story

Kate's former grade school teacher returns to Hooterville. Kate and her children reminisce how Miss Adelaide "Genghis" Keane was so strict on all the children, and she was a dreaded teacher. Kate and the girls are surprised to find that the elderly schoolteacher is no longer the tyrannical disciplinarian she used to be. They all get together to bring Miss Keane's confidence back. It doesn't take long for Miss Keane to become a disciplinarian again and Kate and the girls are beginning to regret what they did. Before Kate can confront her, Adelaide acknowledges that she has gone too far and is scaring people off. Kate finds a way for Miss Keane to be happy again.

25 min